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We somehow missed the Mystik Sanctuary Festival…

2:24 PM EDT on September 17, 2014

mystik sanctuary festival

We always try to do our best to keep you informed about the coolest and weirdest events taking place in the Oklahoma City area. This is especially true when they involve frat parties at the Governor's mansion, swinger get-togethers in the church basement, and / or bean feeds to talk fellowship and the KKK.

Well, we let you down on this one. Yesterday, an Ogle Mole sent me a video recap for something called the Mystic Sanctuary Festival. The event took place a few weekends ago at the Downtown Airpark.

The name of the event is misleading. When I think of a Mystic Sanctuary, I imagine good witches and centaurs dancing around a maypole during harvest singing old songs, catching cartoon fairies and talking about opening up a vape shop. Outside of the vape shop conversations, this "Mystic Sanctuary" was nothing like that awesome vision. It was basically the world's largest audition for Monster energy drink commercial.

Here's the video. Watch for the brief cameo by Wes Welker at about the 38-second mark:

Yeah, that thing was way too cool for me. Seriously, I'm glad I didn't go. I would have been the old guy in the back asking when the Prodigy or Chemical Brothers come on.

After watching the clip, I hopped on Facebook to look for pics of Hipster Boo Boo. I didn't find any. Considering she rarely ventures south of the Plaza District, I should have known this. However, I did stumble across some pics of her friends wearing beautiful things:

dude wearing headdress


white girl in headdress

Okay, before you criticize these kids for being inconsiderate douche bags, please keep in mind they were probably rolling like a bowling ball in a land of black lights, pixie sticks and teletubbies when this happened. Not that being intoxicated is an excuse, but it's not like they were participating in a photo shoot at Remington Park.

Anyway, I'm not sure how I feel about this Mystic Sanctuary Fest. The music really doesn't bother me. Every generation has their weird electronica music that they regret later. You know, genres like new wave, techno, big beat and even Moby.

I guess what gets on my nerves is that the thing makes me feel older than a Crystal Method CD. Not only did I have no clue the festival was taking place, but I didn't even recognize one name on the line-up. That's more embarrassing than being a dude in his 30s wearing a tank top. You could have told me it was a list of failed Bricktown nightclubs and I would have believed you. At least throw DJ Boom on there so I feel relevant.

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