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OSU has a frat problem…


As I've mentioned over the years, I've never understood the point of fraternities and sororities. This is for three reasons:

1) When I graduated from high school, I wanted to get away from the cliques and popularity contests that made high school awful, not re-live them.

2) I came from a lower middle class family that could barely afford to send me to community college, much less buy me some rich friends to get drunk with on the weekends.

3) Community colleges don't have frats

That being said, if I could do it all over again, I'd probably grab a bottle of Fireball and join an OU frat for a year or two. Preferably the one that's associated with the Kappa's. Those girls seem kind of cool.

I wouldn't want to be in an OSU frat. They're depressing. Yesterday, it was announced that one Oklahoma State fraternity was suspended through 2016 for simply being a frat. I wonder if it's the one that had the guy sneaking around campus and groping his frat brothers while they slept.


Move-in day at Oklahoma State University is two weeks away, but no one will be moving into the Phi Delta Theta house.

OSU has suspended the fraternity until August 2016, citing multiple violations of university and Interfraternity Council policies regarding alcohol and hazing.

The two-year suspension will give the fraternity its best chance to succeed in re-establishing a chapter on the OSU campus, Vice President for Student Affairs Lee Bird wrote in a letter to the Phi Delta Theta national headquarters.

Students who will be juniors this fall seemed resolved to cause problems for the chapter, Bird wrote. They threw a keg party at the chapter house May 9 — while the fraternity was on deferred suspension for hazing pledges.

Okay, I did a little research, and it turns out that the guy who was dry humping his brothers was not part of Phi Delta Theta. He was a member of something called Farmhouse, which in frat circles, is about as cool as working at something called "Cracker Barrel." Seriously, Farmhouse? I think that's Greek for "No Friends."

So, what did the frat do to get suspended? Did they hold pledges at gunpoint, make them stare at their laps, and then shoot out a window behind them during some twisted initiation? No, that was Alpha Gamma Rho. It turns out Phi Delta Theta was simply paddling their pledges.

In January, Phi Delta Theta was placed on deferred suspension until August 2015 for “serious hazing violations (paddling).” At least 20 members, including the chapter president, were identified as participating in the paddling of pledges, which caused “severe bruising to the buttocks of at least one pledge.”

The deferred suspension allowed the fraternity to remain on campus as an active chapter while completing a number of requirements. A review committee was formed to meet monthly with fraternity representatives to provide guidance.

I don't know about that. Outside of keg stands, beer pong and Rohypnol, paddling new pledges is one of the most cliché homoerotic fraternity things ever. Don't mess with tradition. What's next? Banning sorority girls from having tickle fights in their panties? This sissified police state is getting out of control. Let frats and sororities continue to do the things they've always been doing. That way, GDI's like me can continue to make fun of them. The last thing we need is for them to be reputable organizations.

P.s. - If you're in a fraternity or sorority and take yourself too seriously and can't laugh at jokes that make fun of your absurd system, you can send us hate mail here.

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