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ICYMI

Mary Fallin still likes the Oklahoma Highway Patrol…

2:04 PM EDT on June 12, 2014

kokh fox 25

The image above is not from some fantasy deep within the subconscious of Governor Fallin, it's actually from a recent news report over at Channel 25.

Yesterday, Governor Fallin signed a bill giving the OHP their first pay raise in nearly seven years. The raise is well deserved and I'm all for it, but I do have one question...

Really??! Out of all the agencies and employees in this state that deserve a raise, Mary gives one to the Highway Patrol? Is she not aware of irony? Does she lack self-awareness? That would be like Bill Clinton giving a raise to all interns. Just like how you casually buy some Burt's Bees and paper plates when you're purchasing condoms at Walgreens, she should have at least thrown a raise to some teachers or state park employees. You know, something to make it a little less obvious she's about to have sex.

Okay, okay. That's a little mean, harsh and extremely disrespectful. We have no proof that Mary Fallin has ever had, or has wanted to have, sex with a state trooper. The rumors that she had an affair is just an urban legend perpetuated by this 1999 news report in the Associated Press:

OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) - A highway patrolman accused of having an affair with Lt. Gov. Mary Fallin while serving as her bodyguard was reinstated Thursday after investigators concluded the relationship was strictly platonic.

Public Safety Commissioner Bob Ricks announced the action following an internal inquiry into the nature of Trooper Greg Allen's relationship with Mary Fallin that culminated Wednesday in a four-hour interrogation and polygraph examination.

"We are confident that there was no sexual relationship that existed between Trooper Allen and the lieutenant governor, that the relationship was strictly platonic," Ricks said.

But Ricks said Allen crossed the line when he tried to comfort the lieutenant governor as she experienced problems in her marriage. He said Allen will receive a letter of admonishment and a two-day suspension without pay.

"Allen thought he was acting to help the lieutenant governor and lost site of his responsibility as a trooper and tried to act as a friend and a counselor," Ricks said. "This conduct is not something that is going to be allowed on the protective detail."

Ricks said Allen will be transferred from the unit and will resume duties as a traffic patrol trooper in Kingfisher County.

Mary Fallin, a Republican who was elected to a second term in November and had been touted as a possible GOP gubernatorial candidate, has filed for divorce from her husband, dentist Joe Fallin. Her husband's attorney has characterized her relationship with the trooper as "an affair."

At a hearing in the case last month, a private investigator testified she saw Mary Fallin and Allen hold hands and kiss on the lips but did not know if they had a sexual relationship.

Joe Fallin testified he had private investigators follow his wife but said he had no "direct evidence" that she committed adultery.

See what I mean? She just had a strictly platonic relationship with a highway patrolmen while she was getting divorced from her weirdo dentist husband. Nothing to see here. No irony. Move along.

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