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Ogle Madness VII: First Round, Midwest (Upper Bracket)

Today's Ogle Madness match-ups involve a god, a bigot and someone who got paid to trash kids who like to play football and have sex with college girls. You decide who is who:

(1) Gary England vs. (16) Captain Bigot from Enid

(8) Marcus Smart vs. (9) Thayer Evans

(4) Marla Morgan vs. (13) Danny Bowien

(5) Mike Morgan vs. (12) Vanity Perkins

Cast your votes!.


(1) Gary England vs. (16) Captain Bigot from Enid

gary england

(1) Gary England

Conference: Gods

Who They Are: God/Former KWTV 9 Meteorologist

Biggest Strength: Omnipotence

Biggest Weakness: Winning Ogle Madness


gary james derp

(16) Captain Bigot from Enid

Conference: Homophobic Racist Assholes

Who They Are: Owner of Gary's Chicaros in Enid, Oklahoma.

Biggest Strength: Was able to make me throw up a little in my mouth from seeing him on TV.

Biggest Weakness: Is a homophobic racist.



(8) Marcus Smart vs. (9) Thayer Evans

marcus smart

(8) Marcus Smart

Conference: OSU Basketball Player

Who They Are: Oklahoma State University Guard

Biggest Strength: Shoving Probably Douchebags

Biggest Weakness: Deciding when to leave for the NBA draft


thayer evans

(9) Thayer Evans

Conference: SI Sports "Writers"

Who He Is: "Reporter" who wrote "expose" on OSU's football program.

Biggest Strengths: Pissing off OSU fans, local media and just about everyone else.

Biggest Weaknesses: Loves hair gel.



(4) Marla Morgan vs. (13) Danny Bowien


(4) Marla Morgan

Conference: Weatherpeople Spouses

Who She Is: KFOR meteorologist Mike Morgan's wife.

Biggest Strengths: Mastery of email.

Biggest Weaknesses: Bedazzled ties.


danny bowien

(13) Danny Bowien

Conference: Hipster Chef Types

Who He Is: Chef who grew up in Oklahoma City and founded Mission Chinese.

Biggest Strength: Fusing wild and different Asian cuisine

Biggest Weakness: You'll be hungry again in 30 minutes.



(5) Mike Morgan vs. (12) Vanity Perkins


(5) Mike Morgan

Conference: Oklahoma Weathermen

Who He Is: KFOR Chief Meteorologist

Biggest Strengths: Severe Storm Preparedness

Biggest Weaknesses: Driving Directions


(12) Vanity Perkins


Conference: NBA Player Wives

Who She Is: Wife to OKC Thunder center Kendrick Perkins

Biggest Strength: Hates Regular Jim Traber

Biggest Weakness: Not too good in a nail salon situation.


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