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Some guy was found naked in a guitar case on a frozen pond near Muskogee…

2:26 PM EST on December 11, 2013

Zackery Aders oklahoma

The guy pictured in the mugshot above is Zackery Aders. The pic was snapped after one of his many drug-related arrests in Muskogee County. Yesterday, Zack's life turned into a real life country music song when he was found naked in a guitar case on a pond near Muskogee.

Via the Muskogee Daily Phoenix:

A Checotah man was rescued Tuesday after he was found wet and naked south of Muskogee in a guitar case.

Zackery Aders, 31, was treated Tuesday evening at EASTAR Health System and was released, a hospital spokeswoman said...

Aders misfortune began as he was trying to walk from Gore to Checotah and got lost, said Charles Pearson, Muskogee County sheriff.

Because I'm that guy, I googled the walking directions from Gore to Checotah. It's a 30-mile walk. According to my sources, the only time you can justify taking a 30-mile walk in arctic conditions is when you're either a) running away and don't want to be found, b) stupid or c) going to get laid. Something tells me it wasn't C.

So, how exactly did all this happen?

“He was walking out on the icy pond, and it caved it on him,” Pearson said. “He took all his clothes off and got in a guitar case. He was in the guitar case trying to keep warm after he fell in the pond.”

People who were checking on their cattle found Aders around 3 p.m. in the southern part of Muskogee County near Oklahoma 2. Aders wet clothes were piled up nearby, he said.

“Some concerned citizens got out with him and called us,” Pearson said.

In addition to EMS, three Muskogee County Sheriff’s deputies arrived as well as Porum police and area volunteer firefighters, Pearson said.

“They had to walk back in there to find him,” he said. “He was so cold he couldn’t even talk.”

First of all, I'm glad that Zack's alive. Just like the ranchers who found him, he'll have one hell of story to tell his friends at the bar.

That being said, I'm confused. How could this guy be dumb enough to go on a 30-mile walk, get lost on that walk, stumble onto a frozen pond, walk across that pond, fall into that pond, and then climb out of that pond, remove his clothes and crawl into a guitar case. Something doesn't add up. Either he's the Bear Grylls of stupid people or owes some really cruel drug dealer a lot of money. Regardless, I can't wait to watch the story on "I Shouldn't Be Alive."

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