Mailbag: Swingers, Sonics and Cubs
2:04 PM EST on January 25, 2013
Before I begin this week's mailbag, I need to go over a few things.
1. Yesterday afternoon I was finally able to catch "Django Unchained." It wasn't bad, although it could have been called "Kill Bill, Part IV" or "Inglorious Basterds: The Spaghetti Westerns." Quentin Jerome Tarantino is one of my favorite filmmakers and Pulp Fiction is my favorite movie ever. Hell, we had a Tarantino themed birthday party a few years ago, but it's about time for him to make a new movie. Or at least revert back to the Reservoir Dogs - Pulp Fiction - Jackie Brown days. I'd take them over the Kill Bill-Basterds-Django trilogy. The over-the-top gory revenge genre flick is getting old. Make something new.
2. Before I caught the movie, I posted this on Twitter:
Five minutes later while I'm watching previews and munching on popcorn, some dude yelled out "LOST OGLE!" from the back of the theatre...at Tinseltown. Well, I guess I'm never tweeting about a movie again.
3. This week's mailbag is being brought to you by Stella in Midtown. You may notice they are partnering with us on a little lunch promotion. Through February 7th, if you take a friend to Stella for lunch, your friend eats free. It really is that simple. Granted, you have to pay for your lunch and everything, but that's pretty cool. Anyway, check them out. I know that Ryan Cunningham and Marcus Mears have grabbed lunched their everyday this week. I know this because they send me pictures on Instagram. They're not as interesting as the ones they send from Patricia's. Also, if you're injured in wreck or a crane falls on you at work, call Marcus and Ryan. They'll take care of you.
See what I did there? I was able to mention three sponsors in one mailbag intro. I'm getting pretty good at this selling out thing. Check out the mailbag after the jump:
If you need cub tickets let me know when you are planning a trip and I can secure 2 to 4 tickets for you at a very cheap price of free.I am just a fan of the blog. I was born and raised in Oklahoma and moved to Chicago 6 years ago. Either way you don't care.If you need Cubs tickets let me know when you are coming up to Chicago and I will provide you some. I can usually get bleacher or 2nd level behind third base. Just need some notice.
I think the new title of the mailbag should be "Patrick asking for free stuff." In a post last week, I mentioned that I wanted to check out a Cubs game in Chicago, and a few hours later, Adam from Chicago sent me that email. Thanks, Adam. I'm going to totally take you up on the offer. I'd like bleacher seats, please. I know Ricketts hangs out there from time to time and I'd like to talk to him about some things.
Anyway, as a new theme, I think I'm going to write about something I'd like to do in each mailbag and see if the Ogle Mole Network can come through for me. I'm going to call it "Make an Ogle Wish."
This week's "Make an Ogle Wish" is catching a Thunder game from the courtside seats. And I don't mean behind the basket or media row or center court Row D, I'm talking about courtside seats. Back in the day when I worked for MidFirst Bank, I somehow landed the Records family's courtside seats to see OU play...Jackson State. That was pretty cool. No lie, the people sitting to my left were Wayman Tisdale (RIP) and Mike Carpenter. They were calling the damn game for the Sooner Sports Network. I can only imagine how cool it would be to sit courtside at a Thunder game. Can someone in the Ogle Mole Network make this happen? I'll trade you two sets of Loud City tickets for it.
I have been hearing a lot about swinger couples around OKC and suburbs and the stories have been told to me by people who live in different communities/school districts who don't know each other. Is there a swinger epidemic accompanying this flu? Are some married couples really not as happy as they portray themselves on facebook and their Xmas cards? Or will I receive Xmas cards next year with swapped spouses? Do you think a lot of the swapping started at Thunder watch parties?
Geeze, I should probably have saved this email for next week's "Make an Ogle Wish."
Actually, I don't really hear a lot about swingers. Then again, I don't hang out at Friends on Memorial and Russell's, so I'm not that engaged in swinger circles.
One other question, if we had to come up with a list of the metro's most likely celebrity swingers and were not allowed to include the Mathis Brothers, wouldn't Mike and Marla Morgan have to be number one? I don't think anyone would be surprised if they were swingers. Number two would probably be Jack and Ron.
Can we get an matchmaker to hook up Rit Mathis and Christina Fallin? This could be epic.
Personally, I'd like to see Christina hook up with Wayne Coyne. They'd be a perfect couple. Granted, Twitter and Instagram might collapse due to an unexpected surge in narcissism, but it would give us plenty of material.
A drunken weekend conversation about how scary Oklahoma politics are has been gestating in my mind, which led me to the attached screenshot from the Oklahoma legislature online bill search. The vote was on HB1060 from the 1993 spring session, and that particular bill was called "Crimes and punishments; modifying provisions relating to spousal rape." Basically, this 1993 (!) bill made raping your spouse illegal in OK.
You will notice in the screenshot, 10 house members and 15 senators voted against this bill. Now, I have been trying to find the House/Senate journals that would tell me who those people are, but online records don't go back that far. Needless to say, I am super curious as to who those people are and whether or not they are still involved in politics. I figured maybe some Moles with more time on their hands and access to an extensive government documents collection (say a college student? near the 5th floor of the Edmond Low Library or its Norman equivalent?) could do some poking.
This is exhibit #98475-A6-4578 of how the Internet has changed everything for the better. Can you imagine the outcry if that legislation was introduced today? It would be loud, everywhere and probably ruin some political careers. Because of that, expect State Rep Josh Cockroft to introduce immediate legislation that will double-ban spousal rape in Oklahoma. You know, because the gub'ment should be limited and not involved in someone's private life.
Back to Edward's email, can someone figure out which 25 lawmakers voted against that legislation? I'd like to find out where they are today. Did they get so frustrated by Oklahoma's draconian political system that they drank themselves to death, or do they now just hangout at Friends on Memorial with Mike Morgan and the Mathis Brothers. We need to know.
My "Manti Te'o Imaginary GF Love Songs":
Stan Silliman is a local stand up comic and humorist. He occasionally sends me the columns he writes for national sites, but I rarely get to write about them. This time I decided to throw him a bone. You know why? Because he's old. He's so old he used to write dinosaur jokes for Argus Hamilton. He remembers when HoHo the Clown was originally HoHo the Gay Sailor. And not like gay-gay, but 1940's happy gay.
Anyway, when you get a chance please go visit Stan's webpage. He really is a local comedy icon. From what I've heard, every young comedian in town has to visit Stan in his little backyard shed before they can make it big in this town. According to Spencer and Joel, it's filled with toy trains and plastic fruit. They don't like that shed. I heard BradJames Nghiem may actually live there.
The Journal Record has a full page article about an artist named "Donk'e Punch". He makes shoes.
If the Journal Record publishes an article and nobody reads it does it make a sound? Seriously, Shaun must either work in PR or be a lawyer in downtown, because I think those are the only people reading articles in the Journal Record.
And I'm not saying that the Journal Record's content is bad. The newspaper (not the "Please buy an ad from us special publications like the Book of Lists) is actually pretty damn good. Their editor Ted Streuli may be the best columnist in the state. The problem is nobody reads the Journal Record because the content is not available online. Well, I guess it is, but you have to be a print subscriber for access. And normal folk like you and me and just about everyone else doesn't need to subscribe to the paper. Seriously, will it really destroy the Journal Record's already limited circulation if the content wasn't free on its website for a day or two?
Have you seen this yet?
You know how history kind of repeats itself? That's why I think the Seattle SuperSonics are the second coming of the NFL's Cleveland Browns. I know the parallels are not exactly the same (the new Cleveland Browns were an expansion franchise. The new Sonics were stolen from another city), but they are pretty damn close. Think about it: City refuses to build new arena for popular, yet recently mismanaged, sports franchise; Franchise then relocates to new town where it's an instant success; City wises up, builds new arena for a new franchise.; New franchise toils, struggles and makes everyone depressed.
There's a typo in the teaser: "Better more to Deer Creek while you still can, Edmonites." (I like the article so far -- just wanted to give you a heads up at the risk of being publicly embarrassed...)
Wait. You found a typo on The Lost Ogle? How publicly embarrassing! That's like finding an aluminum can in beautiful park. It's not uncommon and kind of an annoyance, but the park is still beautiful.
Okay, so maybe I have a slightly inflated view of this little website. But can you blame me? Check out the next email:
I have been hearing good things about TLO but had never visited until this morning. Wow! What a great site. I just finished reading your best 25 Derplahoma comments from KFOR yesterday. I am beyond depressed. I knew there were illiterate, ignorant people in OK but I have never read such pathetic attempts at discussion in my life. I figure that a lot of YOUR followers visit KFOR's call-for-comments and speak up for logic and sanity. I had also never visited KFOR's site, either, as I find all the TV channels to be pretty bad. You get a different view of 4 by looking at their online site. What a cynical bunch of people run that place. Well, I want on your mailing list!
Thank you, Judy. Are you by any chance a swinger?
Anyway, thanks for reading this mailbag and our little website. Have a great weekend.