Originally I planned on starting this post with a pic of Courtney Cox and a joke about how all the cougars from Baker's Street are making their way to South Oklahoma City in search of 12-year-old boys, but I decided against it because it's lazy writing. It's also stereotypical and inaccurate. Just because a woman goes to Baker's Street doesn't make her a cougar. It just means she's easy.
Anyway, a f*cking mountain lion was recently spotted outside a trailer park in far southwest Oklahoma City. News 9 was on the scene to tell us about it:
Several sightings of mountain lions in southwest Oklahoma City near Will Rogers World Airport are putting residents in one neighborhood on alert.
Signs are now warning residents in the Westmoor neighborhood near S.W. 74th Street & Council that trappers have verified cougars live near the area. They are urging everyone to stay off of heavily-wooded trails and keep kids inside from dusk to dawn.
When Nick Stevens hit the trail recently, he did not expect to cross paths with danger.
"It was hiding in a patch of broken down trees," said Nick. "It was a giant cat and it was enormous."
Face to face with a cougar, Nick says he did what any 12 year old should do.
"I ran off as soon as I saw it."
First of all, I know that mountain lions are dangerous and everything, but I really don't have a problem with them hanging around trailer parks. If anything, I think it should be encouraged. I'm all about survival of the fittest.
Also, this isn't the first time a mountain lion / cougar / puma / giant-cat-that-can kill-you-and-eat-you-for-supper has been spotted in Oklahoma. The Oklahoman was in an "uproar" (sorry) a few years ago when a cougar and various other animals were spotted on a feed camera outside of Atoka. Here are a few pictures they posted of the beast:
Okay. Only the first and third picture are real. I totally photoshopped the Leprechaun into that second pic.
Anyway, just as we asked earlier today for Moles to submit pics of unintentional thermometer dongs, we are now seeking pics of Sally Kern trying to convert a gay cougar to heterosexuality outside of a trailer park. We don't even care if it's a regular cougar or one from Baker's Street. Either way, it will be a great photo.