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Ogle Madness V : First Round, Northeast Region (Upper Bracket)

3:00 AM EDT on March 12, 2012

Hi everyone!

My name is Joel Decker. I'm a stand-up comedian, trivia host and former emcee for the Oklahoma City Thunder until we parted ways. In a testament to how low my career has fallen, Patrick has hired me to be your emcee and guide for Ogle Madness V. I'll be posting the daily match-ups, monitoring the polls and raking Clark Matthews' leaves. You think he would have gotten to that already, but he hasn't.

Here are the match-ups for this morning. They are from the upper bracket of the Northeast Region. We'll post the match-ups from the lower half of the bracket at noon:

(1) Kevin Durant vs. (16) Mike Morgan's Bedazzled Weather Tie
(8) Mayor Mick Cornett vs. (9) Cardboard Jim Traber
(4) Jaime Cerreta vs. (13) Sally Kern
(5) Jessica Schambach vs. (12) Landry Jones

Anyway, read about the contestants and vote for who you would like to see advance after the jump. Polling is open for 24-hours. And to view the entire Ogle Madness V bracket, click here.

(1) Kevin Durant vs. (16) Mike Morgan's Bedazzled Weather Tie

(1) Kevin Durant

Conference: Past Ogle Madness Winner

Who he is:  Forward for the Oklahoma City Thunder, Sneaker Pimp

Biggest Strength: Scores more in one game than you've scored your entire life.

Biggest Weakness: Thought this was a fine idea to be a part of.

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(16) Mike Morgan's Bedazzled Weather Tie

Conference: Famous Local News Apparel

Who he is: Tie of weather legend Mike Morgan.

Biggest Strength: If you see that tie, shit's about to get real.

Biggest Weakness: If you see that tie, shit's about to get real bad.

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(8) Mayor Mick Cornett vs. (9) Cardboard Jim Traber

(8) Mayor Mick Cornett

Conference: Our Favorite Mayors Not Named McCheese

Who he is: Mayor of Oklahoma City, best city in the country.

Biggest Strength: MAPS, Thunder, Trivia buff

Biggest Weakness: Can't be mayor forever.

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(9) Cardboard Jim Traber

Conference: Cardboard D-Bag Dopplegangers

Who He Is: Lost Ogle Legend / More personable than real Trabes

Biggest Strengths: Doesn't speak

Biggest Weakness: Looks way too similar to real Trabes.

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(4) Jaime Cerreta vs. (13) Sally Kern

(4) Jaime Cerreta

Conference: Super attractive women who have to put up with Andrew Speno

Who She Is: FOX 25 Reporter

Biggest Strength: Putting up with Speno's insensitive remarks

Biggest Weakness: Not being Lauren Richardson

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(13) Sally Kern

Conference: Women We Can Do Without

Who She Is: Homophobic Politician

Biggest Strengths: N/A

Biggest Weaknesses: Everything. Just...everything.

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(5) Jessica Schambach vs. (12) Landry Jones

(5) Jessica Schambach

Conference: Local News Vixens

Who She Is: KOCO Reporter

Biggest Strengths: Her journalistic integrity. Kidding. Her looks.

Biggest Weaknesses: She's not in 3D and won't return calls or letters.

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(12) Landry Jones

Conference: Halfway Decent OU Quarterbacks

Who he Is: OU Quarterback

Biggest Strengths: Getting away with a bad mustache

Biggest Weaknesses: Getting engaged while being the starting QB for the University of Oklahoma.

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