Outside of what I've learned from watching commercials during Thunder games, this is all I really know about our local energy conglomerates. They are all:
- Clean, natural and abundant - Great places to work - Stewards of the community - Proud supporters of the Oklahoma City Thunder, and - Boring
That's why I think this "Worst of OKC" poll is interesting. One of our town's major energy companies has to be the worse, right? Help us figure out which one after the jump.
*Please note, Aubrey McClendon, Tom Ward and Larry Nichols have each offered us $200 and dinner at the Petroleum Club if we provide them with the IP records and voting logs for this poll...or at least that's what the five men wearing suits, sunglasses and tiny earpieces told me after they landed a black helicopter named "Silkwood" in my front yard. Anyway, if you want to go to the Petroleum Club next Thursday, let us know.
Chesapeake Energy is probably the most well-known energy company in Oklahoma City. This is because they built their own Georgian-style city at 63rd and Western, offer ridiculous perks and benefits to their employees, and in turn expect them all to work long and hard hours for eternity.
Devon Energy is pretty popular right now because they decided to build a giant skyscraper in the heart of Oklahoma City. That's pretty cool, but it's going to suck whenever Sauron's eye moves in and makes Oklahoma City the capital of Mordor.
Midfirst Energy Bank
Because they show a lot of boring commercials during Thunder games, I just assumed Midfirst was also an energy company. After some further research, it appears they are a bank. Oh well, we'll leave them on here anyway.
SandRidge is one of the newer energy companies in town. They are expanding in Downtown, but had to destroy a bunch of useless old buildings to make it happen. This of course, made Steve Lackmeyer and his army of Old Building Protectors pretty mad. They were going to chain themselves to the building in protest, but all the chains in town are currently inside Bob Barry Jr.'s Love Dungeon.
Yeah, I was kind of struggling to come up with a fifth energy company so I decided to just throw the Shock on here. I'd rather be electrocuted by a bolt of lightning than watch a Shock game.