The one where a kid has a “restroom accident” in the pool…

There are about 1,000 reasons why you should never swim in a municipal pool or aquatic center. Here is reason number one:

Pelican Bay Aquatic Center was closed about 3 p.m. Monday after a child had a restroom accident in the swimming pool, pool manager Jared Prince said.

The center will reopen at its regular time at 1 p.m. Tuesday.

Health code requires that the pool is closed for 12 hours after such an incident, Prince said. Chemicals will be used to treat the water, he said.

Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to try to write about this without making one reference to Caddyshack. Here we go:

• Where's this place located, Bushw ...

• After pooping in the pool, I bet the kid went and tried to kill a goph ...

• I asked the Dalai Lama for his opinion on the incident, and he said ...

• The world needs pool poopers, too.

Ahh, screw it. I just can't do it. Watch this, and remember, beware all public pools!