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Law and Order

Introducing the World’s Meanest Grandma…

The lady pictured above is Susan Tessner.  She is the current favorite for the Bad Parenting Foundation's "Mean Grandmother of the Year" award.  From KFOR:

Susan Tessner, 51, was arrested for attacking one of her grandchildren after the child reportedly wouldn't listen to her.

The police reports state Tessner choked the child, grasped her hair, pulled the child out of the out of house, and then struck the child with a glass perfume bottle.

OKC Police Capt. Patrick Stewart said, "This juvenile was able to flee that residence, make contact with another relative and that's when she was taken to the hospital."...

Yeah, child abuse is wrong and everything, but you know what, it's about damn time! Seriously, I think we've all wanted to smack some bratty little kid at one time or another. Thank God someone finally did it.

That being said, it's too bad the lady did it to her granddaughter.  Grandma's are supposed to do nice things like give you unlimited cookies, buy the overpriced Christmas tin of  chocolate-covered peanuts for the school fundraiser, and tell you how handsome and grown up you look when you wear big boy clothes.  They aren't supposed to hit you in the head with bottles of designer impostor perfume.

Anyway, if only Grandma had some secret organization to get her back.  Wait.

Amy Newberry, spokesperson for an organization who works closely with the family, says there is more to the story.

She tells us Tessner stepped in to help raise her grandchildren.

"There have been stress factors related to the girls getting older and, you know, just common teenage issues that we have observed as an organization but this particular physical altercation and assault has been isolated in our opinion," Newberry said.

Neighbors say Tessner went to great lengths to take care of the children.

"Anytime our organization was open for tutoring, she made sure the children were there even if she brought them over and sat there and made sure they were doing their homework," Newberry said.

What's up with that?  It's not every day that a mysterious organization that works "closely with the family" shows up to support a grandma accused of child abuse.  Is grandma in a gang?  Are the kids being trained for the Syndicate?  Is the Bricktown Rotary Club recruiting new members?

No, a quick internet search tells us the organization is something called The Tapestry Project.  They are a community support organization that operates under the motto "making the community livable again."

Now I'm no scientist, but if sticking up for some lady who attacked a kid is "making a community livable again," that may be a sign that you're living in the wrong community. Seriously, grandma may volunteer for the group and the attack may be an isolated incident, but still...she attacked a kid and hit in the head with a perfume bottle!

Then again, maybe the kid deserved what was coming.  If that's the case, maybe grandma should be lauded as some sort of Gran Tarino/Lean on Me style hero.

Anyway, I honestly don't know what the right answer is.  Maybe we should have DHS look into it.  I'm sure they'll do a great job investigating the matter and it will lead to the right outcome.*




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