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The one where Jesus is really happy to see you…

I always thought it was common knowledge that Jesus was a Jew.  Apparently some local "iconographer" didn't get the memo, because her artistic of interpretation of Jesus in the 10ft crucifix above would make even Greg Oden feel ashamed.


Churchgoers are outraged over a crucifix in a Catholic church they say shows Jesus with exposed genitalia.

Janet Jaime is the artist who designed the crucifix hanging in St. Charles Borromeo Catholic Church. She was unavailable for comment, but her husband said critics are misinterpreting a common religious icon.

"This isn't just a subjective drawing. This is a historical icon of the church," said Reggie Jaime, husband of Janet Jaime, an Oklahoma City iconographer commissioned by the church to design the crucifix. "I can't help what you see in things, or she sees in things, or anyone."

Critics of the crucifix take issue with what appears to be a large penis covering the abdominal area...

The crucifix hanging at St. Charles Borromeo resembles other San Damiano crucifixes except for Jesus's abdominal area, which is noticeably more pronounced than on similar crucifixes.

Reggie Jaime said his wife was given instructions by Seeton on how the crucifix was to look. The iconographer was asked to incorporate Catholic art from different time periods for the crucifix, Reggie Jaime said.

Reggie Jaime said critics of the crucifix probably aren't aware of its history and meaning to the Catholic church.

First of all, I haven't seen a cock that big since the Redhawks changed their logo. Ironically enough, that episode in naivety was unintentional, too.

Seriously, how weird and out of touch with the world do you have to be to create a 10-ft crucifix of Jesus Christ and not notice that his midsection looks like a very very very very very large penis?   The answer is probably so weird and out of touch that you'll grow a cactus Oklahoma.

Also, I like how the iconographer's husband claims that "critics of the crucifix probably aren't aware of its history and meaning to the Catholic church."  Now I'm no biblical scholar, but I'm pretty sure the history of the crucifix doesn't include Jesus with a raging case of morning wood.  Also, I've watched enough Roman mini-series on cable premium channels to know that if Jesus really looked like that, the Romans probably would have believed that he was the Messiah.  They also would have named him "Biggus Dickus."

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