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Uncovered: The Sports Animal’s Secret Letter To Sean Sutton

7:01 PM EDT on April 1, 2008

The Lost Ogle's investigative team was dispatched into the field today to see if they could find the real reason behind Sean Sutton's firing. They did not, but they were able to uncover a secret letter sent from the Sports Animal to Sutton after he was let go earlier today. It's kind of yucky. You can find it after the jump.

Dearest Sean,

We wish to give you our deepest sympathies. We give you our assurance that none of us will be the least bit critical of you during this time and that we will mock anyone who attempts to justify your firing, just like we do of those who criticize Brent Venables and the Oklahoma defense.

We know that when you were named as Eddie Sutton's successor we gave you credit for recruiting and running practices during Eddie's final years and said you were as big or bigger a part of OSU's success than Eddie himself. But it is our utmost promise that we will forget we said all that and claim that you only had two years to do your job.

The problem obviously lies with Mike Holder, a man completely in over his head. A real smart athletic director, like say a Jon Saraceno, Cal Ripken, Mackie McNeer or Bluto Blutarsky would never have made this decision. Bobbie Burbridge Lane wouldn't have done it either, even if you sold an old lady's bible for just a quarter.

Also, we are sorry about anything Carey Murdock may have said on the radio today. He has yet to be informed that the Sutton family is off limits on our station. Our henchmen are on the way and we assure you that he will be disappeared into the night, or "Aaron Tuttle'd," as we say around these parts.

If there is anything you need, please let us know.

Sincerely,
The Animal Airstaff

P.S.- Sorry we couldn't join you for beers and pizza at Chuck E. Cheese. We were stuck listening to Traber talk about his near death experience.

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