Top 100 Oklahoma Embarrassments: 20-11
3:04 PM EDT on September 10, 2007
20. David Duke
Perhaps the most famous living Klansman, Duke still fights for segregation decades after Jim Crow laws were repealed. He even pulled a Strom Thurmond and ran for President under a platform of seperating the races. While it is still embarrassing that he was born in Oklahoma, thankfully it was in Tulsa and not Oklahoma City.
19. Brad Pitt
Yes, he is a pretty good actor. But he makes this list because he makes the rest of us guys look bad. Brad Pitt is to men what ultra-thin models on the cover of magazines are to women. Also, Meet Joe Black and Seven Years in Tibet.
18. Joyce Gilchrist
Perhaps the most infamous forensic scientists in the country, Gilchrist made headlines when it was revealed she falsified evidence, withheld evidence from defense attorneys, and refused to perform DNA tests on suspects that could have exonerated them. At least one inmate has since been cleared of wrongdoing, and there are serious questions as to whether others have been wrongly convicted.
17. James Hale
In a market that could not be friendlier to the University of Oklahoma athletics department, one man stands above the rest. We cannot recall a single instance in which Hale has been critical -- or even skeptical -- of a current OU coach. He is the easiest person to spin in the market, and by a large margin. Also, for some reason just thinking about him makes us hungry for Burger King.
16. The Person Interviewed After A Tornado
Our friends from out of state always make fun of the person that gets interviewed after a tornado has destroyed their neighborhood. Inevitably, it's someone that looks like a redneck and who's appearance looks as if they've, well, been through a tornado. Next time their house is destroyed during a storm we think they should take a shower before going out in public.
15. T. Boone Pickens
OSU's sugar daddy gained
fame notoriety during the '80s as a corporate raider, attempting hostile takeovers of various companies, and then selling the stock back at an inflated price. He freely admits that his search for financial success has taken precedence over his family.
14. The New and Improved NewsOK.com
Did you know Amy McRee has a blog on NewsOK.com? Quick, go find it. We'll wait...
Back? If it took you less than three hours, you've got us beat.
It is the most clunky, busy, intrusive web site we've ever seen. Whoever thought this design was a good idea needs to be fired immediately. I can only imagine what it's like for those folks on dial-up trying to navigate their way through the site.
13. Chris "Birdman" Andersen
With his long hair, tall stature, and plethora of tattoos, "The Birdman" was the most recognizable player when the Hornets relocated temporarily to Oklahoma City. For the few months he played here, he seemed to get around a lot. Everyone seemed to have a "I saw 'The Birdman' out at..." story. Maybe that was part of the problem.
Even before setting foot in Oklahoma, Andersen had endeared and demeaned himself with his performance in the 2005 NBA slam dunk competition. After informing viewers that it was "time for the 'Birdman' to fly," he missed a total of thirteen attempts, which is not suprising when performed by 5'9" Nate Robinson, but a bit out of the ordinary for a 6'10" competitor. What he did in Oklahoma was more embarrassing.
After convincing the Hornets that it was worth more than $3 million a year to have him stand around being tall, he blew it all by failing a drug test. Making it particularly disturbing for this state is that "The Birdman" managed to give nothing but clean urine while the team was in New Orleans, a city that boasts about its party scene.
12. The Mathis Brothers
Which is more annoying? The Mathis Brothers' commercials where they are holding a baby, the Mathis Brothers' commercials where they are holding puppies, or the Mathis Brothers' salesmen who accost you the moment you walk in the door and continually ambush you the entire time you're in the store? We'll go with the salesmen, who completely ruin the shopping experience, so much so that we'd shop somewhere else in Oklahoma City, but we don't know of any other furniture salesmen in the area.
11. Michael Brown
If not for Guymon born Michael Brown, #13 might never have made this list. It was his inept management of the emergency response to Hurricane Katrina victims that elevated the ordeal from a tragedy to a crisis. Maybe he received too much of the blame, the guy probably should not have ever been offered a high level government position considering his prior experience was working with the Internation Arabian Horse Association. Then again, his boss publicly stated that "Brownie", was doing a "heckuva job", which is now the gold standard for sarcastically complimenting someone's performance.