Don’t be surprised if you see State Rep. Mickey Dollens on the “Are We Adopting the Same Pup” Facebook group!
Last week, Dollens – a liberal hunkanova who represents a district on the south side – went on KOKH Fox 25 to announce to the ladies (and, ostensibly, the rest of us) that he’s introducing a bill to address pet overpopulation and overcrowding at animal shelters.
Here are the details via KOKH:
An Oklahoma lawmaker is working to address overpopulation in animal shelters. It's an issue we're continuing to see across the state.
State Rep. Mickey Dollens (D-Oklahoma City) tells Fox 25 he's working on a bill at the Capitol that would make spay and neuter programs more accessible. He says he collaborated with many pet protection advocates on this idea.
"Oklahoma currently has a bad pet overpopulation problem," Dollens said. "It’s causing a lot of taxpayer dollars. It’s putting a burden on local municipalities. A lot of cats and dogs are being euthanized. One of the problems, after visiting with a lot of pet protection people, is that spay and neutering is expensive."
Dollens says he's writing a bill that would increase the annual registration fee from $50 to $100. This would apply to pet food manufacturers who sell their products in Oklahoma.
Geeze. As if being a hunky liberal bobsledder with a nice truck wasn’t enough, now Mickey’s stepping up as a savior for Oklahoma’s furry friends. The women on Hinge won’t know what to do with themselves!
That being said, although I applaud his effort and everything, isn’t that a bit excessive? Like, can’t he just take a puppy to the dog park and hit on women like normal playboys do?
Actually, it seems Mickey has long known that one of the master keys to a woman’s heart is loving animals. In fact, he’s made it his political mission to go full Bob Barker for the ladies.
For example, last year, he unsuccessfully pushed for a Dog and Cat “Bill of Rights.”
Via KOKH:
Rep. Mickey Dollens (D-Oklahoma City) proposed HB 1992, the Dog and Cat Bill of Rights Act.
According to the lawmaker, the legislation would inform the public about the significant responsibilities pet ownership entails…
The lawmaker shared that he has a personal connection to the issue of inhumane pet ownership. He explained that his Boston Terrier, named Bucky, came from cruel circumstances.
Yep, that’s right, ladies. He not only rescued a dog from cruelty but named him Bucky! If that wasn’t enough to make you swoon, check out what he did in 2022.
Via KFOR:
Pet Protection Act: New Oklahoma bill could make it illegal to leave dogs in inhumane conditions
The “Pet Protection Act” has been filed for the 2022 legislative session. The proposed legislation would make it illegal to tie or restrain a dog in a manner that is inhumane or detrimental to its health.
“We pride ourselves on the Oklahoma Standard – and of course, that applies to our neighbors, but I believe it also applies to our pets as well,” Representative Mickey Dollens said.
Yep, the mythological “Oklahoma Standard” isn’t just for tornado cleanup anymore—it’s for pets, too!
“Patrick! Are you really busting this handsome beast’s balls for helping animals? God, you’re pathetic.”
Not at all!
I have two geriatric collies I adopted when they were homeless pups (hey, ladies), so I fully admire Mickey’s efforts. It’s just hard not to notice that all this animal welfare advocacy doubles as a Tinder goldmine.
Take this bill he filed in 2021 to help cold dogs:
Via KWTV News 9:
State Lawmaker Files Bill to Protect Animals Kept Outside in Bad Weather Conditions
Rep. Mickey Dollens filed House Bill 1580, outlining requirements for dogs and other animals left outside in extreme weather. Guidelines include clean water, safe bedding, and proper shelters.
Imagine being a dog chained in a backyard on a freezing winter day, only to see Mickey Dollens slide up on his bobsled to rescue you. Iconic, right?
But as the single women at the Jones Assembly learned in 2020, Mickey’s heroics aren’t limited to winter conditions:
Via KTUL Channel 8:
State Rep. Plans to Draft Bill to Address Dog Abuse After Finding Dog Chained Up
Rep. Mickey Dollens tweeted a picture of a dog chained in south Oklahoma City. “If this is your idea of owning a dog, then you shouldn’t have one,” he wrote, promising to draft a bill to address the issue.
I’m starting to wonder if Mickey loves dogs, loves ladies, or is simply angling to be the next host of The Price is Right. Maybe it’s all three?
In any case, like most of his animal welfare bills, his latest proposal will likely follow the same path as all the others and die in the legislature. Let’s not forget we live in a state with a literal Cockfighting Caucus supported by the Governor. Now that is the real Oklahoma Standard.
Still, we applaud Mickey for wagging his tail and fighting the good fight. We can’t wait to see what animal rights bill he introduces next year—and how well it plays on Bumble.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
