In case you missed it, the big national news story to come out of Oklahoma over the weekend was that JUCO QB General Booty committed to play football at OU.
Obviously, it was a big news story not because General can play big-time college football – that's still uncertain – but because his name is General Booty. Even the mature and moral Boomer Trammel couldn't help but giggle at it.
According to an article that was on the front page of ESPN.com, General is aware that his name is legendary:
"Obviously my name's an attention-grabber and people like to do headlines with it, but I like to show people with my play that I can back it up," he told The Dallas Morning News in 2020. "I have done that, I'm going to continue to do that as well, and give them a reason to remember my name."
I love OU football and general booty, so I'm obviously a fan of General Booty and wish him all the best while he wears the crimson and cream. Since he has such a marketable name, he should be on the lookout for some lucrative NIL deals. Here are 7 that he should consider...
1. Dean Blevins
I'm pretty sure General Booty is what Barry Switzer nicknamed Dean when he played at OU, so it would make total sense for Dean to sign Booty as his own personal hypeman. Hell, maybe Dean will even let Al Eschbach use General as a bodyguard on future vacations.
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DW's Adult Video
Sure, DW's might be on the other side of the state line, and a thing called the Internet now exists, but if they could get General to sign autographs at the store on the Friday before the OU-Texas game, I-35 road construction won't be the only thing slowing down traffic.
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Jason Reese, Attorney at Law
Jason Reese – a.k.a. Kevin Stitt's former General Counsel – made headlines a few years ago when his campaign treasurer attempted to write off "Hotwife Chloe Needs To Be Punished" on an expense report. Who knows – maybe Hot Wife Chloe and General Booty can serve as co-spokespeople over at Reese's new "boutique" law firm.
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Swadley's Foggy Bottom Kitchen
Technically, I don't think any Foggy Bottom Kitchens are still open or ever will be, but you have to admit General Booty would be a great spokesman for this buttocks-themed restaurant. Hell, if I were General Booty, I'd submit an invoice to the state for $1.5-million (including management fees) just to see if they'll pay it. Based on what we've learned in the past couple of weeks, they probably will with no questions asked.
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Fowler Autogroup
They've already signed one backup OU quarterback to a big NIL deal, so what's the harm in signing another one?
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Patricia's
Let's just hope the NIL deal doesn't cut into their online ad budget.
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Anyway, those are my seven. If you have any NIL ideas for General Booty, share them in the comments.