Yesterday afternoon, the Ogle Mole Network lit up with reports that State Senator Rob Standridge – a tech-savvy cosplaytriot from Norman – was inviting people to join a secret online Facebook militia to help spread right-wing propaganda in an "orderly and precise manner."
In a nod to the missing section of his own brain, the group is called "Core."
Check this out:
In all fairness, Standridge has a point. When I look at our liberal President, liberal Senate, and soon to be very liberal Supreme Court, the first thing that pops into my head is that it's time for conservatives – especially the "common sense" ones who blindly support Donald Trump – to control the destiny of our nation. They have no power right now thanks to those pesky "leftists" who have been brainwashed by facts.
First of all, why would the "Far Left" want to embrace the "Radical Left?" That would be like saying Southern Baptists are spreading online propaganda to encourage people to embrace Pentecostalism. It's a self-defeating mission! And where does the "Extreme Left" fit into all this? We need answers!
Also, on the topic of "frogs boiling in water," can somebody tell Senator Standridge about social media algorithms, echo chambers and troll farms? You know, stuff that governments, corporations, politicians, special interest groups and teenage Macedonians have been using to manipulate minds, spread misinformation and brainwash conservative Oklahomans on the Internet for the last 10 years or so? Based on what we're about to read next, I don't think he knows they exist:
Although I applaud Standridge's enthusiasm for this project, I sadly don't think it's going to help stop the whole "Why are conservatives so crazy?" narrative. If anything, it will just reinforce it.
That being said, it is pretty cool that Standridge's online militia will have platoons! Seriously, that's badass. I bet when Standridge wrote this he was dressed in full camo and listening to Adagio for Strings, all while imagining himself covertly sharing bald eagle patriot memes on the Democrats of Pottawatomie County Facebook page as napalms torched the jungle behind him.
Let's wrap this up:
Considering the number of people who sent this to me, I guess you can say the militia has already failed in its objective to keep things "Completely Confidential." I guess those boogiemen leftists have more discipline than Stanridge's recruits!
Anyway, I guess if you want to join this cutting edge [online] militia, hit up Rob Standridge on Facebook and request an invite. Have fun trolling!