It's finally safe to let the kids play outside again.
According to this Brianna "Corduroy" Bailey report with The Frontier, we have learned that a brave, heroic Oklahoma state trooper recently arrested a carload of sinister potheads who were in the state to speak at a some marijuana advocacy events.
Here's a pic of the scoundrels:
Wow. Look that evil-looking pair. They're obviously wearing sunglasses because their red eyes are inflamed by the Devil's lettuce. I hope they have to spend a long time in prison thinking about all the pain and suffering they've caused to literally no one.
Here are details of the arrest via The Frontier:
A prominent Colorado medical marijuana activist faces felony drug charges after what she claims was an illegal search of their vehicle in Pittsburg County.
An Oklahoma Highway Patrol trooper found large quantities of marijuana and several pieces of drug paraphernalia in the rental car. Regina Nelson, of Boulder, and two companions were driving to Tulsa, according to a court affidavit filed in the case.
Nelson is a medical marijuana scholar with a PhD who tours the country speaking about cannabis as a treatment for a variety of health issues.
She's a medical marijuana scholar? That sounds like a cool gig! I wonder if she's been able to read the famed Northern Lights Scrolls – a series of ancient texts about the formation of the universe that were written by stoned-age potheads onto slow-burning Zig-Zag papers. I heard they're kind of trippy.
Here's more:
Nelson, her colleague and co-author Michael E. Browning and Nelson’s adult son, Bryan Laufenberg, each face a felony charge of possession of a controlled drug with intent to distribute and a misdemeanor charge of possession of drug paraphernalia after an Oklahoma Highway Patrol searched their rental car during a traffic stop in Pittsburg County on Sunday.
Although the trooper claims in a court affidavit that he stopped Nelson for failing to use her turn signal, her attorney, Brecken Wagner, believes she was targeted because of the Colorado license plates on their rental car.
That's not surprising. Oklahoma law enforcement officials commonly use this tactic to stop and prevent victimless crimes, so whether you're an educated marijuana advocate or a entry-level runner for a Mexican drug cartel, I have a bit of free advice for you – use your blinker.
Nelson refused a search of the rental SUV she was driving, but the trooper found probable cause to search it anyway after he allegedly smelled marijuana, according to the affidavit.
“We should have never had been detained or stopped in the first place,” Nelson said.
According to the affidavit, the trooper found several “rolled cigarettes with a green leafy substance” as well as two glass pipes, a peanut butter edible; a thermos filed with low-point beer; capsules filled with green oil and a backpack containing a digital scale and multiple baggies— also filled with a green leafy substance. A suitcase containing three large vacuum-sealed baggies of marijuana also was found in the car, according to the affidavit.
Geeze. Are they going to a medical marijuana advocacy conference or a party at Wayne Coyne's house? How did they explain that one:
Browning said he owned the suitcase with the vacuum-sealed packages, but denied he sold marijuana, but would share it with “whomever needs it or asks for it,” according to the affidavit.
That's interesting. I've been having "problems sleeping" and occasionally deal with "anxiety "and "stress headaches." Maybe I should live dangerously and schedule a meeting with Mr. Browning to see if he can help me?
Anyway, you can read the rest of this over at The Frontier. Also, the victims... errr... suspects have created a Go Fund Me to help cover their legal fees associated with the arrest. You can donate here.