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Ogle Madness VIII: Southeast Region (Lower Bracket)

Hey all, it's time for today's Ogle Madness afternoon matchups. If you didn't vote this morning, be sure to go do that. The afternoon games feature one loudmouth sports talkshow host, one loudmouth politician, and two things from Lake Hefner. I wonder if the lighthouse is jealous?

(6) Lake Hefner Goats vs (11) Lake Hefner Frackers
(3) Bob Stoops vs (14) Jim Inhofe
(7) Mama Bear vs (10) Regular Jim Traber
(2) Blake Shelton vs (15) Red Dog Cafe Chef


(6) Lake Hefner Goats vs (11) Lake Hefner Frackers

goats eating grass

(6) Lake Hefner Goats

Who they are: Oklahoma City's most modern lawnmowers

Strengths: Saves on gas.

Weaknesses: Have you ever met a goat? Those sons of bitches are mean as hell. Zero social skills.



(11) Lake Hefner Frackers

Who they are: The living embodiment of everything anti-frackers have been warning about

Strengths: A complete disregard for the serenity of homeowners or park-goers

Weaknesses: So bad at PR an oil and gas company actually lost the media war in the state of Oklahoma



(3) Bob Stoops vs (14) Jim Inhofe

bob stoops

(3) Bob Stoops

Who he is: A once great coach determined to recapture the glory days, like something out of a terrible movie

Strengths: No matter what, he seems to just get paid more and more

Weaknesses: Clock management. Re-punting.



(14) Jim Inhofe

Who he is: An idiot. A huge idiot. No seriously, the man is an idiot.

Strengths: Really good at killing tagged doves that get released out of boxes

Weaknesses: Not good at landing planes.



(7) Mama Bear vs (10) Regular Jim Traber

(7) Mama Bear

Who she is: Slut-shaming (former) superintendent of Noble Schools

Strengths: Lots of puritanical church schools around this state will probably hire her.

Weaknesses: Needs to find a masculine word equivalent to "skank" so that she can properly humiliate the boys hahahaha just kidding that will never happen


traber pizza

(10) Regular Jim Traber

Who he is: A horrible dinosaur of a man working in a dying industry

Strengths: Most famous catfish victim in the history of Oklahoma

Weaknesses Short, fat, little hands.

traber headline



(2) Blake Shelton vs (15) The Red Dog Cafe Chef


(2) Blake Shelton

Who he is: Adam Levine-annoying country singer and reality show judge

Strengths: Sings cool vintage Okie commercials

Weaknesses: His taste in pizza



(15) Red Dog Cafe Chef

Who he is: The genius behind one of the best burgers in Oklahoma City

Strengths: Satisfying Louis Fowler

Weaknesses: Keeping frozen shrimp in stock


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