2013 Year in Review: June
8:30 AM EST on December 20, 2013
(Update: Looks like we were visited by the screw up fairy and published the wrong month. Today should have been May. Oops. I guess this "Year in Review" is turning into that weird "Out of Order" alternative music countdown show from the 1990s.)
June of 2013 saw the release of "Man of Steel" a film no one
asked for needed. The video above is better than that movie. If not for Kevin Costner the Man of Steel would have been a waste of time. Wait. Do you like seeing Russel Crowe jump on some sort of falcor/pterodactyl hybrid? Do you like plucky Amy Adams as a non-plucky Lois Lane? How's about five minutes of plot and 138 minutes of shit gettin' blowed up real good? Then you probably liked Man of Steel. Also, let's not hang out because you're probably 10 years old and not very interesting.
Don't forget to vote for your favorite June stories! It'll make today awesome!
What We Said: "Geeze, the Stoops family must be as good at locking doors as the OU secondary is at locking down wide receivers. I guess this is what happens when you hire Tom Wort to be your security guard."
What We Learned: Don't rob Stoopsy's house because I doubt he has the same things in it 1980's Switzer had in his home. Instead of access to 57 boxes of Sooner visors the robbers could have gotten a lifetime of whiskey and a weekend's worth of blow.
Fun Fact: The main suspect confessed to police after they showed up at a party this guy was at. He was bragging about the robbery. Bet that guy gets invited to a lot less parties now. Well, parties not in Stillwater. That guy is a god in Stillwater.
Best Comment: "No dobermans? No hired thugs patrolling the grounds with uzis? No dome of protection? WTF are they doing at Norman anyway?"- Howdy
Published: 06/25/2013, 06/24/13
What We Said: "What do you think the +/- is on how many rap videos Tiffany Tatro’s appeared in during her life? I’d say five is a safe bet. Of course, I’m kind of flustered right now, so what do I know."
What We Learned: Tatro has appeared in no rap videos. As of yet. I'm positive Lil Mike & Funny Bone would put her in a video. I'm sure it would be great. Just...great.
Fun Fact: Some of the women on the list are no longer in this market. OKC is like the hourly hotel rates of local news hotties in that someone gets $60 and is gone in an hour.
Best Comment: "The gentleman in the photo with Michelle Apon use to be with former KOCO reporter Amanda Guerra. That guy has been in more on air talent than an IFB." - Mars45
What We Said: "As a lifelong OU fan, it’s kind of refreshing to see an OU quarterback act like the big man on campus. I’m not saying I want Blake to get a job at Big Red Sports and Imports or anything, but the guy’s in college and should be out having fun. If a girl did that to Landry Jones, he would have stood on the chair, got a nose bleed and thrown an interception to Manti Te’o."
What We Learned: Football players are amongst the more popular of things women like to grind on when drunk. See also: pole, stripper and me, not.
Fun Fact: She's suing him for child support. Not really but it's bound to happen and some point to that guy.
Best Comment: "The Belle Dozer."- RT
What We Said: "Sorry to dash your hopes and dreams attention-mongering housewives of Oklahoma City. It looks like you’re going to have to wait a little longer for national fame, fortune and the opportunity to disgrace your family’s heritage. Tough break. I think you should all meet at Flip’s, drink some flirtinis and cry about it."
What We Learned: Wealthy people and local news outlets can be pretty gullible. Had we known it was this easy to dupe wealthy Edmonites we would have started a reality show rumor years ago.
Fun Fact: Somewhere the plastic face of a wealthy OKC house wife was straining to produce tears from collapsed tear ducts upon the news her vapidity wouldn't be viewed by bored housewives across the nation.
Best Comment: "Aren’t these people content with competing to have photos of themselves, half-lit and draping their arms over one another, appear in the back pages of Slice?"- Harry Balzac
Published: 06/03/2013, 06/06/13
What We Said: "As you probably know, it has not been the best week ever for KFOR Meteorologist Mike Morgan. After we published a round up of tweets that were highly critical of the sparkly bedazzled tie wearer’s Friday night storm coverage, The Oklahoman, Gazette and even Reuters piled on with their own write-ups of Get-out-of-the-way-gate."
What We Learned: Don't give driving directions to people if you're on the air. Ever.
Fun Fact: No one got injured as a result of "driving south." I promise you'll never hear those words in that combination from Mike's mouth again though. Ever.
What We Said: Last week I watched the first episode of “Street Outlaws” on Discovery.com. I doubt anyone would be surprised by this, but the show is mind-numbingly awful. It makes Saving Grace look like The Wire. It’s kind of like an Amish Mafia for grown men and teenage boys who cruise 39th Street and still listen to The Katt, only without the hysterical Amish sub-text that inspired you to text a friend “OMG have you seen Amish Mafia?!”
What We Learned: People love their street racing reality shows. They love them so much they go ahead and send a bunch of hate mail to the site.
Fun Fact: With nearly 100,000 unique pageviews, this has been the most viewed post on TLO during 2013.
Best Comment: Season 2 of "OKC Cars Go Zoom Zoom Fast!" returned to Discovery a few weeks ago. Yeah. We didn't notice either.
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