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Law and Order

These two moms are awesome at being pathetic human beings

The lady pictured above is Melissa Boyer. If you're wondering why she's having the bad hair day to end all bad hair days, it's because she was arrested for a DUI in South Oklahoma City. And oh yeah, she's preggers.

From NewsOK:

A pregnant Oklahoma City woman arrested last week on complaints of driving under the influence of alcohol and child endangerment told The Oklahoman she has a high-risk pregnancy and regrets drinking three beers before getting behind the wheel.

Melissa Dawn Boyer, 29, was arrested after someone called 911 about 9:30 p.m. Thursday and reported a vehicle swerving in the 9300 block of S Santa Fe Avenue.

Another driver called police and followed the swerving vehicle until it stopped because of a flat tire, police said.

Officers arrived and met with Boyer, who had slurred speech and was unsteady on her feet, according to the police report.

‘Mommy is sleepy'

She told officers she was five months pregnant and experiencing back pains. Police said Boyer also had her 5-year-old daughter in the vehicle with her at the time. The girl told officers at the scene, “I think my mommy is sleepy,” police said.

Boyer said in a phone interview Monday she had just dropped her husband off at a mechanic's shop to pick up his vehicle and was on her way home when she got lost and noticed the vehicle had a flat tire.

You know, 5-year-old kids and pregnant women are two of the most annoying things on this planet, but even I don't condone this type of reckless behavior. If she's going to endanger her life, her daughter's life and her unborn child's life, she should at least do it in the privacy of her own home.

Unfortunately for anyone with a soul, Ms. Boyer isn't the only pathetic mom from Oklahoma to make the news. Check out this story about a Tulsa mom who just gave birth to her seventh baby that's been born a drug addict or taken away for abuse.

Child neglect charges have been filed against a Tulsa woman after her baby was born addicted to cocaine a few weeks ago. She was arrested Wednesday evening.
What makes this case so unusual is that it's her seventh baby that's been either born addicted to drugs or taken away for abuse.

District attorney Tim Harris says enough is enough, and this case is no longer just a matter for DHS but also the courts. The case is now in his office.

Records show 34-year-old Daiquiri Miller has been booked into the Tulsa County jail 14 different times. Police say most of her arrests involved drugs and prostitution.

She has also given birth to seven children; the most recent on March 31st of this year, a girl who police say was born addicted to cocaine.

"The mother did admit to her doctor that she had used cocaine on a nearly daily basis while pregnant and did not have prenatal care, other than one appointment 10 weeks before birth," Tulsa Police Corporal Greg Smith said.

Note to all parents, if you name your daughter Daiquiri, there is a 76.9% probability that she will either become a drug addict, stripper or best friends with Cedric Jones. Seriously, what a disgrace to humanity. She should be locked up in prison and not released until she hits menopause.

Anyway, sorry about dampening the mood. For some reason, stories about drunk driving pregnant moms and crack babies are depressing and intense. To lighten the mood, here's a picture of Alex Cameron:

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