I've got a lot of issues with Twitter. Perhaps my biggest is that the only people who seem to use it are boring egomaniacs. Imagine then my lack of surprise when we learned that NewsOK's Dave Morris has a twitter page. You can see it at: twitter.com/knowyourmo.
By visiting Dave's page, you get to learn what he does when he's not saving the world at The Oklahoman. If visiting his page sounds sad and boring, trust us on this, it is. Here's a few samples of the life of Dave Morris.
"¢ finished scooping a small forest of leafs out of the pool, time for gym - about 8 hours ago from mobile web
"¢ in the office finishing one last video. off to the studio tonight. falcon has a few new songs and a few holiday gigs coming up.. - 4:11 PM Nov 12th from web
"¢ i'm thinking doug sauter is one of the nicer guys who's taped a segment in the opubco studios - 11:36 AM Nov 11th from web
Raking leaves? Holiday gigs? Brownnosing Doug Sauter. Man. That is some boring stuff. I was kind of hoping it would say things like:
"¢ Bought some new sunglasses. Can't find scissors to cut the tags." - 4:38 PM Nov 7th from mobile web
"¢ Went number 2 in handicapped bathroom at OPUBCO. Mr. Monday may have caught me. - 4:38 PM Nov 3rd from mobile web
"¢ Just "˜did it' with my insanely hot wife. Take that idiot bloggers! - 12:08 PM Oct 30th from web
Yeah, updates like that would have been much better. Oh well, at least we got to know that Dave has 59 followers. I honestly don't know which is sadder: Dave actually takes a moment to let people know that he's going to gym, or that there are 59 people out there who care.
Seriously, I think we need to bring back that old "John TV" that used to play on the Cox public access channel, and instead of showing prostitutes and local attorneys, simply show the people who have signed up to follow Dave on Twitter. How much do you want to bet that they would all cancel their account pretty fast?
Anyway, I have no clue if somebody can set a Twitter page to private, but I bet we'll learn pretty soon. So I would suggest you visit his page before it is gone. In the meantime, I'm going to go eat a banana and do some jumping jacks. I'm then going to save a family and litter of cute puppies from a raging inferno. And I'm going to do all that because I am a hero.
