Merry Justice League of Oklahoma (Episode 2.4)
7:42 PM EST on December 27, 2007
Previously: After the Bedlam drubbing, Bob Stoops learned of a plot to sabotage the Big XII title game by kidnapping Sam Bradford. Gary England accepted the case for the Justice League, sending Bryant Reeves and Lauren Richardson to Stillwater to investigate if anyone at OSU might be involved in the plan. They spoke with Mike Gundy and Boone Pickens, but were unable to track down Robert Allen. Gary also assigned "The White Lantern", Jason White, to personally protect Bradford.
Location: The Storm Chaser's Lair
After spending Monday in Stillwater, Big Country Reeves and Lauren Richardson report back to Gary England first thing Tuesday morning. As the duo enter to brief the Justice League's leader, they see him watching "News 9 This Morning" and muttering to himself, "You stepped on the 'Allergy Index,' Castles, how many times have I told you to emphasize the higher levels first?" Reeves gets his attention by knocking on the ceiling.
ENGLAND: Jump back! How long have you guys been standing there?
RICHARDSON: Just a couple of minutes. We didn't want to interrupt your chief meteorology duties.
ENGLAND: That's nice, if only the bad guys we're after would show the same courtesy. Okay, talk to me, did you see any power flashes?
REEVES: Power flashes?
ENGLAND: Sorry, force of habit, what did you see?
RICHARDSON: Coach Gundy was pretty adamant he is not involved, and I believe him. I was a little surprised that a few people started clapping when he finished his denial, though.
REEVES: That was weird since there was no one else in the office.
RICHARDSON: We also talked to Boone Pickens. He was remarkably frank when we talked to him. Bryant and I are pretty sure he isn't involved, either.
ENGLAND: What about Robert Allen?
REEVES: We couldn't find him.
ENGLAND: Are you serious? The man's so big that he shows up on Google Maps.
RICHARDSON: It was weird. Normally, with an OSU legend around it would be impossible to get rid of him without granting an interview, but the one time we did see him, he got away.
ENGLAND: Again, are you serious? A man his size has to move like a glacier.
REEVES: It was as if he just disappeared.
ENGLAND: Anything else?
RICHARDSON: That's all from Stillwater, but I got a lead this morning on the way here. You remember that guy, Patrick Nelson, the one who helped us figure out that Aaron Tuttle was a rogue meteorologist?
ENGLAND: The guy from the inner nets?
RICHARDSON: Yeah. Well, I was heading out the door and he just happened to be out in front of my house. He said he was walking his dog...now that I think about it, he didn't have a dog...that's funny. Anyway, I told him what was going on and he had a theory that it was some guy named Clark Matthews.
ENGLAND: Any particular reason?
RICHARDSON: Clark is another internet blogger. Apparently he is an OSU alumnus and doesn't have a very good opinion of OU.
REEVES: That puts him in the same category as just about every other Oklahoma State graduate.
RICHARDSON: Well, Patrick was pretty convinced that he would do something like this.
ENGLAND: There's only one way to find out. Go talk to him. In the meantime, I'm going to put an APB out on Mr. Allen. Stay with me, I'll keep you advised.
LOCATION: University of Oklahoma Indoor Practice Facility
Josh Heupel works with Sam Bradford, Keith Nicol, and Joey Hazle. In the background, Jason White keeps an eye out for any would be kidnappers. When approached by current players, he offers to sign their jersey for $5.
LOCATION: News 9 Newsroom
Gary has just finished ripping Jed Castles for a poor performance in the morning broadcast. As he fills up his coffee mug, he is approached by Amy McRee.
"I have an odd question for you," she says. "Have you heard anything about something happening to Sam Bradford?"
"Sure, he got a concussion during the Texas Tech game," Gary replies coyly.
"That's not what I meant. I heard something might be happening this week. Supposedly, Coach Stoops is really concerned and might have asked for help from a secret crime fighting organization."
With an aire of faux ignorance that only Gary England could pull off, he shrugs it off as crazy sounding. "You probably shouldn't bring that up to anyone else, he says. Amy, however, will not let it go.
"I didn't think you'd know, but it never hurts to ask. Dean was the first person I talked to, since he says he's Bob Stoops' best friend. He didn't know anything either. I think his exact quote was, 'There's a 30% chance of something like that happening, and an 80% chance that if such an organization exists, I'd be in charge of it.' Whether it's a dead end or not, it's fun to be doing some real journalistic work."
Location: Matthews Manor
Richardson and Reeves arrive at the home of Clark Matthews. Before they can knock, a balding, though strikingly handsome, red-headed man shushes them then ushers them in to the living room. On the sofa, Mrs. Matthews knits or crochets--the one with the hooks, not the needles--while watching Scrubs re-runs. Clark sits back in his recliner and begins typing on his laptop.
"Are you Clark Matthews?" Lauren asks.
"I am. Sorry, I just put the ClarkPupp down for his nap, so we'll have to do this quietly."
"That's fine," Lauren continues using her indoor voice, "we've been sent to ask you some questions. Your friend Patrick..."
"My friend? Do your friends accuse you of being an evil mastermind? I can save you all a bunch of time, and myself for that matter, and let you know that technically, yes, I am behind it."
Richardson looks shocked and Reeves gasps while taking a couple of steps backwards, where in the process, he smacks his head on the door frame. They attempt to regroup, but before they can begin questioning, Matthews continues:
"I am behind the kidnapping attempt, I am behind your quest to uncover the plot, I am behind the Justice League of Oklahoma, and I am even behind your presence here now."
"I don't think I follow you," says Reeves while rubbing the back of his head.
"I control everything that happens in your universe. Everything you do, everything you say exists only in my head and then on the internet where I write it for the readers of The Lost Ogle. Except for the guy who posts as Ralph Wiggum. That guy is a douche."
"Hold on, that isn't true, I led the Oklahoma State Cowboys to the Final Four, I played for the Vancouver Grizzlies. I exist."
"In a sense yes," Matthews allows, "In that reality you basically own the town of Gans, Oklahoma and fish everyday that you aren't watching OSU games from behind the bench. I'd say the reality I write for you is more exciting."
"If what you say is true," Lauren Richardson interrupts, "where is the peyote? You have to be smoking something."
Matthews laughs. "You'd be surprised...in fact, because I say so, you are surprised. No drugs. I don't even drink. Anyway, I am not going to be your ultimate villain in this case. So that means you will have to look elsewhere."
"You know you could save us all a lot of time if you'd just tell us who it is," Richardson suggest hopefully.
Matthews smirks. "What's the fun in that?"
CHECK BACK NEXT WEEK FOR EPISODE 2.5
Stay in touch
Sign up for our free newsletter
More from The Lost Ogle
Drew Stitt allegedly used OHP “Official Business” parking decal for personal use…
Moles are also telling us he tried to cut a wheel lock off his truck because he's received so many parking tickets!
Body cam footage finally emerges from drunken Little Stitter incident at Guthrie Haunts…
It begins with the gubernatorial name drop and ends with OHP showing up to escort little Stitter home.