Not only does Markwayne Mullin have the intellect of an 8-year-old, but the imagination of one, too.
Last night, Marcuswayne – our U.S. senator who, like me, was neither brave nor disciplined enough to serve in the military – got lit up on left-wing social media after hopping on Fox News and attempting to mansplain the smells, tastes, and general horrors of war, as if he’d personally stormed a beach somewhere.
Check this out:
Yep, good old Marcuswayne Mullin hopped on live TV to talk about the smells of war. Based on his experience being around gunfire, I assume it smells like shit.
Seriously, if you’re going to cosplay as a battlefield philosopher on national television, it helps if there’s not photographic evidence of you cowering during a light insurrection back home.
As I mentioned, Marcuswayne’s comments ignited like napalm in the left-wing political propaganda sphere, with assorted blue-check accounts quickly pointing out that he has never served in the armed forces or experienced combat, and was therefore describing war the same way a kid describes dinosaurs.
Listen, I think it’s absurd for Marcuswayne to go on TV and narrate the sensory experience of combat like he’s auditioning for Band of Brothers. His thoughts on the smell and taste of war should carry as much weight as James Lankford’s thoughts on the smell and taste of sex, but... I’m not going to be too hard on the guy.
First of all, if I were thrown onto a Fox News set to defend “Operation Yet Another Middle Eastern War,” I might also start rattling off dramatic monologues about the smell of battle. What’s he supposed to say? “Yeah, this might be legally questionable and geopolitically reckless?”
Second, as I mentioned earlier, Markwayne not only has the intellect of an 8-year-old, but the imagination of one, too. The guy still probably wears G.I. Joe underwear and reenacts the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan before going to bed each night.
In his primitive mind, he’s probably experienced all the smells and tastes he so vividly recalled, so I guess it’s okay for him to go on TV and blabber about it. It’s just dumb ol’ Marcuswayne being dumb ol’ Marcuswayne.
Anyway, with Markwayne being one of the GOP’s most popular TV talking heads – the dumber the better, apparently – I have a feeling this won’t be the last time he says something stupid on TV about the war.
Maybe next week, he can talk about the quality of the food in the mess halls or discuss the texture of regime change.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
