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State Arsonists Laud Stitt’s Move to Burn Down Forestry Department…

I guess it’s time for another follow-up on the hottest Oklahoma political news story this season – Governor Stitt’s pouty and vindictive attempt to sabotage the Forestry Department because they weren’t able to save his hobby farm from a wildfire!

As expected, the Governor’s firing of Forestry Department head Mark Goeller and other department leaders – along with his random musings calling for the elimination of the department – generated a heavy dose of bipartisan backlash from all across the Oklahoma political ecosystem, with media, lawmakers, and politicos of all political persuasions questioning the Governor’s judgment.

That being said, not everyone is against him.

Late last night, I was forwarded a press release by something called the Oklahoma Fire Caucus.

Apparently, it’s a group of rural Oklahoma lawmakers who support the Governor’s plan to eliminate the Forestry Department and hold those slacker firefighters who didn’t protect his hobby farm accountable.

I guess they’re holding a Bonfire Rally in support of Stitt this Saturday. Well, at least that’s what the group’s Communication Coordinator – Tyler Picrika – is claiming:

Oklahoma Fire Caucus Announces Bonfire Rally in Support of Governor Kevin Stitt

With Governor Kevin Stitt facing heavy heat from Democrats, unions, and big-government firefighting bureaucracies across the state, the newly formed Fire Caucus of the Oklahoma Legislature is hosting a Bonfire Rally this Saturday at Lazy E Arena in Guthrie.

“For too long, the so-called 'forestry experts' in this state have pushed a dangerous, woke agenda that treats fire as something to be feared and extinguished — not harnessed and controlled for the glory of God,” said Fire Caucus Senate Chair Shane Jett (R–Shawnee). “In reality, fire is a cleansing force — a biblical force — that God intended to use to burn away sin, underbrush, and trans folks.”

Jett also criticized the Forestry Department’s long-standing war on wildfires, referring to them as “God’s lawnmower.”

“By implementing costly conservation efforts to prevent wildfires from burning, the Forestry Department is not only hurting Oklahoma’s fire-based economy, but directly interfering with God’s divine plan,” Jett continued. “As it is written in Peter 3:10: ‘The elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.’”

Before I continue, I should probably clarify that I have no clue if the Oklahoma Fire Caucus – or this planned event – is a real thing.

As The Oklahoman proved this week, it’s getting harder and harder in today’s day and age to discern satire from the truth!

Here’s more:

The Bonfire Rally at Lazy E Arena will include live music, food trucks, propane demonstrations, and the ceremonial burning of woke textbooks. Admission is free with a gas can.

“The message we want to get out — along with our support for the Governor — is that our state’s Forestry Department and their wasteful wildfire prevention initiatives interfere with Oklahoma tradition, culture, and values,” said Justin Humphrey (R–Lane), who serves as the Fire Caucus chair for the Oklahoma House. “Whether you’re a pyromancer, arsonist, or just a guy trying to smoke out a Sasquatch, you should have the right to burn whatever you want, whenever you want — in Oklahoma.”

The bonfire is being sponsored by Gateway Mortgage and Zippo Lighters, with all proceeds and donations benefiting the Oklahoma Arson Defense Fund.

Yep. That has to be satire. There’s no way Zippo Lighters would damage their reputation and come out pro-Stitt and anti-firefighters. Fake news. Whoever wasted their time writing that is a sad loser.

Anyway, since the Oklahoma Fire Caucus is probably not a real thing, it seems like the only people who support Stitt’s plan are, in fact, arsonists, pyromancers, and Bigfoot hunters. And, uhm, the big corporations that want unfettered access to the timber in Oklahoma's forests. 

That probably explains why Stitt is now walking back his comments. 

In a recent interview on News 9, he admitted he wasn’t actually going to eliminate the department.

Then, to follow that up, Stitt — a no red tape, no bureaucracy, no waste “businessman” governor — announced he was going to form a bureaucratic red tape committee to waste taxpayer dollars and investigate the department.

Via News 9:

In response to the recent wildfire outbreak in Oklahoma, Governor Kevin Stitt has announced the creation of the Wildland Fire Response Working Group, which aims to review and improve the state’s wildfire response strategies…

"I will hold people accountable if they're not doing their job, helping our rural firefighters and suppressing fires in Oklahoma," Stitt stated, underscoring his commitment to improving the state’s approach to managing wildfires.

Not to go for the low-hanging fruit here, but if the governor was really into holding people accountable for not doing their job, I think he would have fired himself years ago.

Anyway, whether you're an arsonist, a firefighter, or an inept governor who says and does stupid things — we’ll continue following this story and provide updates.

In the meantime… stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.

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