I have some sad news for those Oklahomans who still enjoy getting their nightly sports fix on local network TV at 10:25pm... on the nights the weather doesn’t run long.
Last night, KFOR’s Dylan Buckingham announced he’s hanging up the sports coat, resetting the chyron, delivering one final boom goes the dynamite, and walking away from TV sports after 15 years on the studio court.
The whole thing was a surprisingly emotional affair.
Fighting back tears, Dylan admitted that he doesn’t love sports the way he once did. He said giving it his all each night before Jimmy Fallon finally took both an emotional and physical toll. He then thanked his mentors, heroes, and my old pal Loren Fultenberg, before breaking down in a fit of violent sobbing.
This display didn’t sit well with Kevin Ogle.
Visibly annoyed by the theatrics, Kevin stood up from the anchor desk, reached toward Dylan, and grabbed a big wad of his tie and shirt collar with his mighty left hand. As Dylan’s face turned crimson and his eyes bulged, Kevin repeatedly slapped him with his free hand, shouting: “Get ahold of yourself, young man! This is live TV, goddammit! LIVE TELEVISION!”
As chaos ensued, Emily Sutton and Lucas Ross—who, for reasons unclear, was dressed as a banjo-pickin’ rodeo clown—ran onto the set in a failed attempt to deescalate the situation. Kevin released Dylan and immediately turned his rage toward Lucas, who was doe-si-doing in circles and shouting, “High and dry, Kevin! High and dry!”
Just as Kevin began stomping his feet in preparation for a charging attack, Emily darted forward like a lightning bolt. She leapt onto the anchor desk, slid across it like a figure skater on a slab of ice, and stabbed Kevin in the ribs with a giant horse tranquilizer.
Within seconds, the rage melted from Kevin’s face. His jaw went slack in a state of orgasmic delirium, and he slumped back into his chair, mumbling “Mike with the weather… Mike with the weather…” before drifting into unconsciousness.
Or at least I think that’s what happened. I ate some weird mushrooms yesterday, and—as the little gnome in my living room just reminded me—things can get a little strange.
Normally, I’d embed a video of Dylan’s farewell announcement so we could all watch it together, but Lord Elon has destroyed Twitter so badly that embedded videos barely work anymore.
Instead, here’s a vintage 15-year-old photo of Joleen Chaney and Bobby Miller inspecting watermelons in Rush Springs:
Honestly, even Dylan would agree that blast from The Lost Ogle past is probably more entertaining than the announcement.
After Dylan regained his composure—and medics checked Kevin for any side effects of the tranquilizer—he did share some good news.
Instead of doing what most former sports anchors do (i.e., jumping into oil and gas or real estate), Dylan is sticking around KFOR. He’s accepted a new role as a “multimedia journalist,” where he’ll host exclusive shows on their streaming app, KFOR+.
I’m not entirely sure what that means, but hey—good for him!
I think he's basically pulling a Mick Cornett / Ed Murray combo, shifting from sports anchor to multimedia guy, with a decent chance of becoming OKC Mayor or one of the founding fathers of Sellout Crowd 2.0 someday.
Anyway, we’d like to wish Dylan the best of luck in the wild world of multimedia journalism. He seems like a good dude, and I’m sure he’ll do great—at least until he begrudgingly pivots to oil and gas or real estate.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
