The party that’s for freedom, capitalism, and small, limited government—except when they’re not—is once again rearing its ugly, hypocritical head.
This time around, instead of trying to regulate your body, weed, or incognito browser, conservative Oklahoma politicians want the government to get entangled in a signature Oklahoma pastime—storm chasing!
According to this article on the slow-loading and still-in-existence McCarville Report, State Representative Scott Fetgatter is pushing through a bill at the Capitol that will regulate storm chasing.
It’s called the “Get Val on the Gentner Storm Chasing Regulation Act.”
Via an obscure local political blog:
Representative Scott Fetgatter’s goal of creating a license for professional storm chasers in Oklahoma took a step toward reality this week. The House Business Committee passed House Bill 2426 by a margin of nine to zero.
The license will give professional storm chasers special accommodation during severe weather events. They must be affiliated with a media outlet or research program at specified universities.
I’m more of a storm fleer than a storm chaser. I'd rather watch Severe Weather Porn from the comfort of my dry living room instead of dodging tornadoes, hail, and other storm chasers in the wild on Oklahoma backroads. But is this really necessary?
Sure, the various storm chasers—from researchers to media hacks to tour guides—who flock to our state each April and May can clog Oklahoma roads and get in the way of first responders, but isn’t that part of the charm? I mean, if you’re buried under the rubble of your home following a tornado, there’s just something fun about not knowing if the people digging for you are the police, the fire department, or Reed Timmer.
Also, what will this do to amateur storm chasing?
For every Buck King, Mark Dillard, or Chance Coldiron out there racing through the plains, there’s a Jim Bob, Larry Dale, or Markwayne with a sixer of Busch Light rolling right behind them for the simple thrill of it.
What will these burdensome regulations do to them?
That’s a good question. Right now, it appears Fetgatter and Co. are trying to legislate a storm-chasing caste system:
Fetgatter says that while the bill is a work in progress, the idea isn’t to limit who can chase storms. His bill is not intended to restrict amateur storm chasing.
Instead, the measure would allow licensed professional storm trackers to be considered first responders. The Oklahoma Insurance Department would manage the program. The fee is not to exceed $500, and renewals will be capped at $250…
Yep, good news for all you rural storm chasers out there who think a library card is a sign of government overreach! You’ll need to register with the state, pay a fee, and take a CPR class just to drive through the country and chase a storm.
I wonder what rules and regulations they'll think of for other Oklahoma pastimes next? Requiring noodlers to wear gloves? An excise tax on frybread?
Here’s what Fetgatter had to say about it:
“We love storm chasing in Oklahoma. We’ve made movies about storm chasing in this state. Nothing in this bill will stop this most American of rights,” Fetgatter said. “But we have to be able to give professional severe weather trackers the ability to chase storms without being impeded.”
Ah, yes. Storm chasing… the most American of rights.
That may seem melodramatic, but Fetgatter probably knows what he’s talking about. He is one of the preeminent constitutional scholars at the Capitol, which explains why he spent a good chunk of his legislative career emulating the look of Ben Franklin:
For what it’s worth, that’s the second of three distinct looks Fetgatter has gone with during his nine years at the Capitol.
When he was first elected, he went with the Peter Griffin look...
Now, appropriately, he’s giving off TV weatherman vibes.
As I mentioned earlier, Fetgatter’s bill breezed through a committee with a 9-0 vote. On that note, you’d think it has a good chance of becoming law, but I’m not so confident.
From Gary England to Aaron Tuttle to Jim Gardner to Alan Broerse to Chance Coldiron, the local severe weather and storm-chasing industry has strong anti-government leanings and considers any type of regulation an infringement on their rights. I don’t think they’re going to take too kindly to this attempt by the nanny state to control them.
In addition to that, many of these same people have large followings and strong social media clout, which means they can rally their audiences against lawmakers they see as infringing on their ‘most American of rights.’
"From my cold, dead Gentner," they’ll say.
Anyway, I guess we’ll continue to follow this and keep you updated.
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
