I hope everyone enjoyed the first significant winter weather event of the season!
I know our local media sure did.
As expected, they provided round-the-clock live coverage of the winter wonderland dust-up that dropped a good four to six inches of wet, sticky, snowman-able flakes on Oklahoma soil.
For the most part, the coverage included the typical wintery mix of live coverage that Oklahoma weather watchers are accustomed to.
You know, footage from storm-chasers sliding around to report road conditions, reporters armed with yardsticks at busy intersections to verify that, yes, it’s snowing, and, of course, the classic live telephone interview with an official from the city or highway patrol encouraging people to stay at home unless they need to be out.
This time around, however, they tried some new live time-killing tactics.
For example, News 9 sent a pair of its nubile anchorettes across the street to Scissortail Park to provide a live sledding report. What could go wrong with that?
Well, a lot.
As men, women, and children of all ages lobbed snowballs at each other, one young broseph hopped on screen to quickly share his crude and vulgar descritpion of sexual intercourse into the microphone, sending the News 9 anchorettes into a blizzard-worthy spin.
Check this out:
Welp. I guess we now know why we don’t see a lot of live sledding reports on the news! Sending a reporter to the local Ace Hardware to cover shortages of snow shovels, generators, and ice melt is a much safer move—and far less likely to score management some FCC fines!
If you had trouble making it out, I believe the bro said "Poke(?) her right in the <insert Trump slang word for female genitalia>."
Which begs the response – "Really dude?"
You get three seconds on live TV, and instead of saying “Hi Mom!,” you drop a shocker and some explicit commentary? I bet he’s related to the “She Wants The D” t-shirt guy from the Moore tornado!
Although the guy kind of ruined the festive mood, I want to give a quick shout-out to the News 9 anchorettes for how they handled the situation.
I have no clue who they are—because I’m kind of out of touch with that stuff now—but the dying seal noises they emitted did a fantastic job distracting everyone from what just happened.
Seriously, I don’t know if they teach young journalists to make that sound, but it kind of reminded me of the infamous “Grape Lady” news blooper.
Anyway, with this recent snowstorm and the accompanying media hype melting away, I guess this should serve as a warning to everyone to watch your backs—and your mics—during live coverage at a city park on a snow day.
From here on out, they should stick with the traditional stuff, like sending Jonathan Condor out to rescue motorists stranded in their gardening clogs, or to see if local college students can handle 5 to 8 inches:
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
