If you’re looking for proof that our state’s idiocracy has no intent of slowing down – or that our State Superintendent of Public Education has a thing for tubby men from Texas – you should definitely check out the new campaign ad where Ryan Walters endorses Paul “Big Tex” Bondar for US Congress.
In case you forgot, Bondar is the alt-right Texan carpetbagger who’s trying to buy and flip the Oklahoma 4th Congressional District that’s long been ruled by Good Ol' Boy GOP establishment conservative Tom Cole – the DC power broker who’s better known around these parts as The Duke of the Chickasaw.
The ad, which resembles a day-time TV commercial for personal injury attorneys who can't afford a tailor, shows a disheveled Ryan – with sleeves rolled up like he just tussled with the owner of the Harbor Mountain Coffee Shop – standing next to a silent and somewhat confused Bondar, informing the masses he’s the only Oklahoma politician who’s psychotic enough to endorse a Texan.
Check it out:
Yep, nothing says "a return to common sense and normalcy" like two right-wing turds saying they want to fight for schools and kids by abolishing the Department of Education.
With that being said, that was actually a solid commerical.
Based on the production quality – and the natural, conversational speaking skills of Ryan and Paul – it reminded me of those old 1.800.2SellHomes commercials featuring Paulette and Emily:
Okay, I’d like to apologize to Paulette and Emily for throwing them under the bus. Ryan’s endorsement was more along the lines of this:
The online journalist pundit types and anti-Ryan Walters social media crowd have - fittingly and deservedly - mocked, criticized and lampooned Ryan's endorsement. They’re portraying his decision to cross the Tom Cole picket line and endorse an out-of-state Texan as a huge career mistake, on par with digging his own grave and committing political suicide.
For example:
I couldn’t disagree more. I think that Ryan's move was both a smart and logical one!
First of all, what’s Ryan got to lose?
He’s already the genital warts of the Oklahoma GOP. The establishment types want to steer clear of him, avoid infection, and burn him off, while the ones who accept him – Derplahomans, MAGA zealots, and Right Wing Christian Nationalists – are already infected, and to make matters worse, won’t let their daughters get HPV vaccines, so he might as well double-down and take a ride on the Bondar bandwagon.
Also, unless he’s at a Moms For Liberty gang bang, Ryan doesn’t really get a lot of opportunities to hang out with – much less endorse – fellow politicians who look dumber than he is, so he can’t turn down that opportunity.
Seriously, how many horse tranquilizers did they shoot Bondar with before filming that thing?
I don’t think Bondar knew who Ryan Walters was, much less why he was there. When it was Paul’s turn to talk, I was almost expecting him to promptly hug Ryan, call him a “little bunny rabbit” and then name him “George.”
There could be one more reason Ryan endorses Paul Bunyan or whatever.
There are rumors circulating in the Oklahoma GOP circles that Ryan’s puppet master Matt Langston – the campaign advisor turned lavishly paid OSDE ghost employee – is one of the people behind Bondar’s move for Cole’s seat.
I have no clue if that’s true, but it wouldn’t surprise me. AssMatt did gleefully promote Paul on this X feed:
Plus, ever since Matt infiltrated the right-wing Oklahoma political ecosystem like a Giardia plague at Turner Falls, one of his favorite things to do is reward his fellow Texan political operatives with cushy jobs and government contracts in Oklahoma.
I guess it would only make sense for him to try to give one of his Texas pals – especially a rich one with ties to Russia – a Congressional seat.
Anyway, I guess we’ll be watching and monitoring the airwaves to see if any other right-wing Oklahoma politicians with nothing to lose cross the political picket lines and endorse Bondar over Cole. Until then…
Stay with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.
