Oklahoma State Superintendent of Education Ryan Walters issued a video today blaming the disappearance of the sun in the Southeastern Oklahoma sky on “Woke Trans Teacher DEI Indoctrinators.”
“The terrorism tactics of Woke Trans Teacher DEI Indoctrinators has reached a sad new low today,” said Walters from his bunker at the Oklahoma State Department of Education. “Using ancient East Coast elitist liberal sorcery tactics, these people who hate America removed the sun from the Oklahoma sky in a failed effort to scare students into following their BLM, CRT, DEI belief system.”
The news refutes a statement from NASA, which says the sun’s disappearance was part of a phenomenon called a solar eclipse – a rare event when the Moon passes between the Sun and Earth, casting a shadow over parts of Earth and blocking the face of the Sun for observers in those locations.
"From global warming to radical gender theory, Joe Biden and his team of liberal 'scientists' will do whatever they can to promote atheism in schools, and pollute the minds of students. Oklahomans can count on me to always fight back against this governmental campaign disinformation and overreach," Walters added.
Following Walters's video, Oklahoma Governor Kevin Stitt announced that he immediately enacted Executive Order 479.32 and authorized the Oklahoma National Guard to restore the sun to the sky.
“After much prayer, I commanded my administration to return it promptly to the Oklahoma sky. This task only took three minutes, and restored Oklahoma as a Top 10 state for sunlight. I'm grateful for the dedicated service of the men and women serving in the National Guard. "
According to Stitt, traffic delays are expected around Broken Bow as motorists flee the area.
Walters concluded his video with one final message, before speaking in tongues and taking a sip of coffee from the Harbor Mountain Coffee House.
“Whether they are making the sun disappear from the sky, or shaking Oklahoma bedrock as part of an effort to harm the oil and gas industry, my administration will do whatever possible to stop these woke liberal indoctrination tactics and continue to defend traditional Oklahoma values.”
