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Oklahoma baker loves insurrections and colorful confections….

Add a new name to the list of Derplahoman patriots who were arrested for trying to overthrow the United States government.

Last week, the FBI arrested Dova Winegeart – the owner of Dova's Patisserie & Café in the remote Derplahoma hamlet of Fairview – on a wide variety of charges, including the destruction of government property and disorderly conduct.

I have to admit, the photo evidence is pretty compelling:

Yeah, let this serve as a warning to any other red-coated traitors out there to wear less identifiable clothing – perhaps something that doesn't make you look like Stalin's old mistress – the next time you try to overthrow the government.

In addition to the photos, I guess the Feds got their hands on a bunch of text messages that Dova sent to friends bragging about the attack. These are apparently the same friends who turned Dova into the FBI, which means Dova probably needs better friends.

According to my NW Oklahoma Moles, Dova's arrest has hit the Fairview community harder than a wooden pole on a government door.

In February, the town's local Nazi – Walmart shopper Alexander Feastercommitted suicide while awaiting trial for shooting a woman who tried to remove a Nazi flag from his property, and now the owner of the local "Patisserie" is facing jail time.

What's the town going to do?!

If Dova ends up in jail for her part in the assault on our democratically elected government, who's going to make the town's delicate French pastries, cakes and edible spiral dildos?

In all honesty, Dova does appear to be an excellent cake maker who I totally expect to see on a future episode of OAN's new hit reality show – Insurrectionist Baking Challenge. Check out these treats:


Here's one she made for a woman who wanted to apparently spend Valentine's Day alone...

Here's an unusual Mac Tonight-themed cake for a baby boy:

Now that she's facing federal charges and possible jail time, we don't know if Dova will be able to keep up with the baking. Although I'm sure right-wing traitors from all across the state would like to buy her cakes if they could, she's already put the cafe side of her business on the market:

I guess if you want to own a cafe in a sparsely populated town of 2,600 – or simply want to order some decorated cookies from a Patisserie – hit up Dova on social media.

Stay with The Lost Ogle. We'll keep you advised.

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