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Freedom Isn’t Free: Oklahoma’s “Patriots” Show Up to the State Capitol

5:26 AM EDT on August 16, 2021

Over the weekend, alt-right patriots who want to overthrow our government gathered at the Oklahoma capital to raise their plucky fists against—let me check my notes—vaccines and mask mandates.

The rally was organized by the Oklahoma GOP and its handgun-friendly demigod, chairman John Bennett.

With thousands of real men and women attending the rally, the message of governmental takeover was on everyone’s lips and hips, especially when Bennett got his mouth around the phallic-friendly microphone to let everyone know what the true notion of the rally was for. From KFOR:

“It’s only a matter of time before you won’t be able to do anything without the permission of a communist government who will require proof of vaccination,” Oklahoma GOP Chairman John Bennett said.

Not only that, I might add, but if you get sick from Covid, it’s probably because you did something to offend the American flag and he’s showing his patriotic vengeance through a mixture of sacred Freemasonry rites.

As penis-worthy trucks with Trump flags hanging out the back drag-raced in front of television cameras, many people came out to support Bennett and his Christ-like comparison that Covid vaccination is the equivalent to Jews—not Christ-believers, mind you—being tagged with yellow stars during the Holocaust.

If you know anything about white history like Bennett surely does, you’d know that this Covid identification is far worse—more worse than the actual disease which, of course, doesn’t exist—mostly because it affects voting Americans, the true chosen people of the Christian God, all in an effort to stop right-wingers from being elected and re-elected.

It’s a fair and balanced point that attendee Ken Smith agrees with. Kinda. From KFOR:

“In America now, it’s vaccinated on one side, and unvaccinated on the other side, so under the premise of segregation, it’s very similar to other types of segregation that have happened in the past, but when it comes to the killing of six million Jews, I don’t think that’s exactly what they mean,” Smith said.

Okay, so maybe it’s not like the actual Holocaust, but it’s definitely like good ol’ fashioned American segregation of the past and, for many races, the present. Whenever there is something that conservative white people don’t like, remember, it’s always the worst thing in this state’s, country’s world’s history.

And that makes sense to me because America makes sense to me, and that’s the only thing that matters. Well, that and Oklahoma. And guns. And steaks. And the Bible. And trucks. And the flag. But mostly America.

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Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.

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