Even though he's a wealthy businessman who essentially purchased the 2018 Oklahoma gubernatorial election, Kevin Stitt – like every other annoying politician on this planet – regularly blasts emails to his supporters, and apparently some detractors, begging them to donate money to his campaign.
Like 99.9% of political fundraising emails, Stitt's messages rely heavily on lies, hysterics, twisted rhetoric, half-truths and lots of ALL CAPS to dupe stupid people into donating.
This includes the following email he sent late last week where he attempts to blame President Joe Biden for the Chick-fil-A sauce shortage that's allegedly being caused by global supply chain issues that resulted from a once-in-a-lifetime pandemic that altered life as we know it:
Listen, I know both Republicans and Democrats like to unfairly blame each other for things that neither have a lot of control over, and I also know Kevin Stitt is a narcissistic nimrod who has no problem lying, but doesn't this take things too far?
Seriously, what's next? Saying Jo Biden wants to ban hamburgers? How dumb does Kevin Stitt think people are? There's no way that...
Wait. Stitt's emailing people who volunteered to sign up for his emails. I bet he does think they're pretty dumb.
Either way, blaming Joe Biden for Chick-fil-A smartly publicizing that the pandemic has allegedly caused a Chick-fil-A sauce shortage – which will allow the company to start "temporarily" (a.k.a. soon-to-be-permanently) charging for extra-sauce with no negative pushback from consumers – is weak and a slap in the face to the geniuses in the Chick-fil-A PR department who came up with the plan.
Here's the rest of the email:
Yep, Kevin Stitt's going to protect us from the Vegan agenda. That's good to know. The last thing I want to do is live in a state where people dip things like potatoes in Chick-fil-A sauce.
Anyway, I'm not sure what's sadder and scarier. Is it politicians emailing crazy shit like this out to people, or is it people actually believing it? While you ponder that question, don't forget to text "JOINS TITT" to get Stitter's text message updates. If you think his emails are bad, I can only imagine what his texts are like. Here's a guess.
