Small town Oklahoma is no stranger to drugs, bigotry, and institutionalized unethical behavior. So to say Achille seems to be the most screwed up, back ass wards town in Oklahoma is a pretty bold claim. But I am sticking by it. Last week, the former mayor of this rural town, David Northcutt, was arrested after allegedly breaking into the police department’s evidence room to steal guns, drugs, and cash. Then Northcutt allegedly blamed his actions on a meth addiction.
Generally, we’d spend 2-3 more paragraphs unpacking this particular story, because meth’d out mayors aren’t something you come across every day, even in Oklahoma. But instead, we are using Achille’s most recent antics as a segue to the insanity that has come from this town of less than 500 in just the last 2 years. So, hold on to your mother effins hats, readers. Because we’re about to go balls deep into the story of Achille: the The Methed Out, Bigoted Uncle of Oklahoma Towns.
First of all, let’s take a good look at the politicians of Achille, America. Like we said, last week the now former mayor was arrested for allegedly stealing guns and about $8,000 in cash (apparently used for gambling purposes) from his own police department. But before this, Northcutt already had one hell of a rap sheet, because in October 2018 he was arrested for alleged burglary and meth possession. All this took place after the 2017 investigation into Northcutt reportedly firing a gunshot at his boyfriend during an argument. Nuts, right?
But here’s the thing. Northcutt is not the only elected official in Achille making our blog. Because in December of last year another former mayor and then sitting city councilman, Lynn Chambers, was arrested with four others in a drug bust. I started this post with the wondering of what is in the water to make Achille, Oklahoma such a weird ass place. But I think we can all agree that it’s meth.
And lord baby Jesus, we haven’t even gotten to Achille law enforcement yet. Ya’ll remember Bart Alsbrook, the Nazi cop who was hired by the Colbert Police Department to make the town safe from non-whites through bloodshed and Hitler-worshiping? Well shortly after all this hoopla, the Achille Chief of Police Christopher Watson thought ole Alsbrook would be a great fit for his police department. In fact, Watson even stated he knew fully of Alsbrook’s vita of Nazi activities, which includes serving as the coordinator of the skinhead hate group, Blood & Honor, and still brought him on to the force. But wait, there’s more!