Salutations, you beautiful bastards! Welcome to the second round of the legendary Ogle Madness! You can view the updated bracket here. Hopefully you did better on it than your NCAA picks.
Here's who's up next:
(1) Russell Westbrook vs (9) David Boren
(4) Slappy McHeeHaw vs (12) Skirvin Ghost
(3) Teachers vs (11) Ribeye Steak
(2) Joleen Chaney vs (10) Cow Tipping T-Shirts
Vote!
(1) Russel Westbrook
Round One: Defeated (16) Berry Tramel 465-186
Who: One of the best to play the game
Biggest Strength: Basketballing
Biggest Weakness: Racist Utah Jazz Fans
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(9) David Boren
Round One: Defeated (8) Jim Gallogly 413-225
Who: Former “hands-on” OU President
Biggest Strength: Ability to dodge blame and ridicule
Biggest Weakness: National Merit Scholars
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(4) Slappy McHeeHaw
Round One: Defeated (13) James Lankford 509-123
Who: Fictitious Lawmaker who went to the Speaker’s Ball
Biggest Strength: Bailing hay, whistling and smoking a corn cob pipe
Biggest Weakness: Words and hygiene
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(12) Skirvin Ghost
Round One: Defeated (5) Damon Lane 488-153
Who: A spectral maid looming the hotel halls
Biggest Strength: Floating through walls
Biggest Weakness: Probably watches you poop
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(3) Teachers
Round One: Defeated (14) Markwayne Mullin 459-53
Who: People most screwed by Oklahoma lawmakers lack of empathy
Biggest Strength: Education and crowd-sourcing
Biggest Weakness: Disposable income
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(11) Ribeye Steak
Round One: Defeated (6) Indian Taco 324-201
Who: The official cut of beef of the State of Oklahoma
Biggest Strength: Food backed by biased lawmakers and ranchers
Biggest Weakness: Not a porterhouse
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(2) Joleen Chaney
Round One: Defeated (15) Lake Overholser 351-200
Who: KFOR news anchor
Biggest Strength: Matriarch of News Channel 4 and a black cocktail dress
Biggest Weakness: Replying to text messages
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(10) Cow Tipping T-Shirts
Round One: Defeated (7) David Holt 313-235
Who: Airport t-shirts raising awareness of animal epidemic
Biggest Strength: Rallying farmers and concerned citizens
Biggest Weakness: It’s a t-shirt sold at an airport
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