Sometimes, when I’m cruising down Adventure Road in search of cool restaurants or high-risk sexual encounters, I’ll often see a sign for a town and think, “Huh, Altus would make a great name for a beagle that joins the football team and takes them to state!” or “If I had a Brussels Griffon, I’d probably name him Cordell and he’d be a former stunt dog who now runs a private investigations agency!”
This idea was compounded while I was recently working on an article about the Bella Foundation’s current volunteer opportunities and need for not only fosters to take in these lovable pups, but open-hearted forever homes to give them a second chance at life. As I looked over the .zip file of precious angels needing new homes, I couldn’t help but match them up with some more Oklahoma towns that would make great dog names. Try this game on your next road trip across the Sooner state!
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Ardmore
Meet Ardmore, a thrice-divorced former alcoholic looking for a new leash on life. 90 days sober, Ardmore is craving a loving home that offers room and board in exchange for belly-rubs and routine deep-ear scratchings. But, more importantly, he needs someone to make sure he maintains his sobriety and holds him accountable on a daily basis.
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Bixby
Like a thief in the night, Bixby will steal your heart and any errant jewelry you might leave hanging around. In deep to the mob for almost 32 large, this playful scamp is always up for a game of Texas Hold ‘Em, even though he really shouldn’t. Maybe if you become his new mom or dad you can teach him more breed appropriate games, like fetch, tug of war or high-stakes stock market prognosticating.
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Hominy
A true rural Oklahoma success story, Hominy became a single mother at the age of 1 and, unfortunately, lost her babies to both the state and a hungry raccoon. Undaunted, Hominy became a student at the University of Phoenix where she majored in human services, earning her a degree and a job at an area clinic where she councils young women who are currently in the same hot spots she once was.
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Purcell
After coming home from school one afternoon to find his parents taken in by the area’s local pound, never to be seen again, young Purcell ran away and has spent much of his life in and out of foster homes and various locked crates. However, when a former roommate at a local no-kill shelter that loaned him a copy of Saul Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals, he turned his whole life around and has gone on to become one of the state’s premier activists for animal shelter reform, receiving an honorary doctorate from Yale in the spring of 2015.
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Wayne and Payne
This mischievous pair is a package deal and often communicates in their own very special language that is pointless to try and decipher. Many times Wayne will go into a trance and prophesy of the “time of tribulation” when the “Dark One” will rise from the oceans and/or someone will use the hairdryer, with Payne being the only “Chosen One” that can slay these demonic behemoths from the depths. They also love chewing on their Kongs stuffed with peanut butter for hours on end!
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Seriously, though: adopt your next dog if you possibly can. Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler.