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Mary Fallin drove a tank…

mary fallin tank

It's going to be another great a four years.

In what can only be interpreted as a symbolic statement to how she crushed Joe Dorman, Mary Fallin drove a tank over an old, beat up car on Friday.

She also fired a machine gun.

It was all part of the grand opening celebrations for the new Wilshire Gun. It's the new gun range near Nichols Hills that has a restaurant and bar on premises.


A large crowd gathered at the Wilshire Gun grand opening Friday to watch Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin drive a tank over an old car.

The stunt kicked off the three-day opening celebration, as Wilshire Gun becomes the first shooting range in the state to sell alcohol.

“Well it was interesting being able to ride in this tank and crush a car, and what an exciting way to open up the Wilshire Gun range today,” Fallin said. “It’s a great new edition to Oklahoma City and it’s creating jobs.”

Fallin said having a place that teaches gun safety is an important addition to the community.

“Having the ability to have meeting spaces where people can learn about gun safety and the appropriate handling of firearms, which is also a very important part of gun ownership,” Fallin said.

Yes, outside of a nursery or fireworks stand, there's no better place to learn about gun safety and the appropriate handling of firearms than a gun range that serves alcohol. Because you know, alcohol helps you retain information and improve decision making.

There are plenty of ridiculous images from the event. My two favorites were tweeted by Hank from Family Guy impersonator Morgan Chesky:

fallin tank 2
fallin gun 2

Well, I think this explains why Wilshire Gun recently asked for a full-sized, cardboard cutout of me.

Anyway, we give Governor Fallin a hard time on this site, but can you really blame her for doing this? That seems badass. If one of your friends called you right now and said "Hey, want to come over and drink a few beers, crush a Camry with a tank, and then fire off a crazy machine gun to overcompensate for a small penis," you'd be there quicker than you can say "highway patrolman"

My only complaint is that they didn't take things further. If you're going to crush some school teacher's old Camry like it's the hopes and dreams of a soon-to-be-failed third grader, you might as well go all out and... wait a second... I think I just figured out the real symbolism behind this stunt. Who knew Mary Fallin could be so deep with allegories?

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