Yesterday, everyone's favorite Oklahoma City-based band, Hinder, announced that they were parting ways with their lead "singer," Austin Winkler.
From NewsOK:
“I’m really proud of what we accomplished over the years,” says Hinder drummer (and songwriter/producer) Cody Hanson. “We hold no animosity towards Austin, and wish him the best. Although it was a difficult decision, it was the best thing for everyone involved and time for us to move on. “This summer/fall tour was a tough one. We want to thank the fans for all their overwhelming support. We couldn’t have made it through everything without you. We are very excited about the future of Hinder and can’t wait to share the next chapter with all of you!”
So Hinder is looking for a new singer. Who will fill the Austin Winkler-shaped void fronting the band? We thought it would be a good idea to come up with some suggestions.
Bryan Abrams, formerly of Color Me Badd
He's trying to put his life back together after pleading guilty to domestic abuse, and he left his old band a couple months ago, so now is as good a time as any to re-invent himself. Let's just hope he doesn't try to eat the band.
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Thayer Evans
He definitely has the look down pat, but a Thayer Evans-fronted Hinder would probably never be able to play the Orange Peel.
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Janet Baressi
A good fit, because I give them both Hinder and Baressi F's.
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A can of Axe Body Spray
Scientists have said that when you break down the DNA of the members of Hinder, they are composed of 96% Axe Body Spray.
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Criss Angel
Looks a whole lot like Austin Winkler, and turning Hinder into a good band would be the greatest trick a magician could possibly pull off.
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Matt Bacon
He'd love to be in the band... like a vulture.
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Reed Timmer
He's got the eXtreeeeeeme personality thing down perfectly. Would fit right in.
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Old-school Brianna Bailey
Call me crazy, but touring with a band seems like it would be way more interesting than writing about real estate sales.
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There you have it. Thanks for reading, especially since this is way more than any of us should ever have to think about Hinder. Follow me on Twitter here.