Great, now the Oklahoma Gazette is mad at us…

11:10 AM EST on January 12, 2015

On Saturday morning, someone left a comment in our Hot Girl Friday write-up of Olivia Jordan claiming The Oklahoma Gazette was "coming after" us, and not in a sexual way. That's great. First the Tecumseh Times hates us and now The Gazette has beef. This is really going to hurt our brand and reputation with people in their 50s who don't have the Internet.

Here's what the commenter wrote: [sic]

I just read through the Gazette this morning (I was in the dr’s waiting room, that’s my excuse) and was just reading about this. So, they come after you because instead of stuff like this and the state fair photos, while they post boring stuff that doesn’t do much but restate what already put you to sleep, and then little ads in back that you don’t want to bother looking at.

I honestly had no clue what the commenter was talking about. At first I thought maybe The Gazette also had an article about Olivia Jordan. Considering she's attractive and still at least a year or two from becoming mainstream, I knew that couldn't be the case. So I hopped over to OKGazette.com to see what was up, and get this, the site actually loaded within 10 seconds! How about that?! I think that's a new record for them. They must have upgraded to the Blue Host Premier Hosting package over the weekend. They're now going to be able to handle hundreds of hits each day. Sweet!

Anyway, I did some digging, and sure enough, The Gazette wrote a defensive blurb about us in Wednesday's Chicken Fried News. I'm not sure what's sadder. Is it that The Gazette is stooping to our childish level, or is it that we didn't hear about this until Saturday morning? I guess word still doesn't flow very fast in the unconnected world.

Here's the article. They're all salty because we called them out for the sad Wayne Coyne mask, the turkey suit saga, and that we profile of hot girls from Oklahoma on the internet each Friday.

Check it out:

Chicken-Fried News: Call us surprised
In the last few months, the obscure local social blog that once graced the cover of this paper has waged an ugly, malicious attack on the very core of our existence.

First of all, The Gazette did run a cover story on us back in 2008. That's really nice and we appreciate it, but that was seven years ago. A lot has changed since then. For example, the guy who wrote the piece now works at PayCom. And just look at how much this site has grown ... and The Oklahoma Gazette paper has shrunk. It's so thin that homeless people now have to steal a dozen copies just to make one pillow.

Here's more from the slam piece:

First, we were labeled uncool for publishing a Wayne Coyne mask, meant to scare the kids on Halloween, on our cover.
Next, we were called unfunny because we wouldn’t let the blog’s publisher appear on yet another cover in a turkey suit wearing that same so-called uncool mask.
Total bummer, man.
Most recently, we found out we’re suffering from a tragic decline of intellect. (Oh wait. The Lost Ogle didn’t write that! It was written by the blog publisher’s former University of Central Oklahoma professor. TLO linked to it because its publisher thought it was amusing.)
OK; that last one is funny.
We’ll admit it. TLO is cooler, funnier and intellectual-ier. Every week, it features a “hot girl” — in a bikini, underwear, ’80s prom dress, whatever — and that’s clever. TLO makes the time to feature its completely original version of the Page Three girl, sort of like how The Sun tabloid across the pond has done since 1970. Now that’s … progressive!
Every year, TLO also holds a massive contest to find the fattest, most tattooed and mullet-headed white people to grace its site, too.

Yeah, we're ripping off The Sun with HGF. Not the Chive, or Superficial, or any other website that would have served as a modern, 21st century reference. No, we're imitating an English lad mag that was first published in the 1970s. Now that's ... surprising?

Also, at least the State Fair Contest isn't rigged like the "Best of OKC" sham they run each year. At last check, Oklahoma Gazette "readers" – that's what we'll call the Gazette advertisers who stuff ballots – have honored Ted's as the best Mexican restaurant in Oklahoma City for something like 15 years running. According to Louis Fowler, Ted's is still contemplating adding flavor to their food.

They even called us out for pointing out the Governor's lack of fashion sense:

Plus, there’s the biting satire — you know, like fetishes with Gov. Mary Fallin’s open-toed shoes — that shows the level of intellect to which we can only aspire.
You’re on the road to full success, TLO!
With love, from the most obviously mature, intellectually better-er and non-shit-eating-grin-having alternative news source on, well, this block. High-five. Or perhaps we just need a hug.

And that's it. I guess if you're ever going to be roasted, you better pray to God it's by a writer for The Oklahoma Gazette. They're about as hardcore as the staff of Trochta's. You can see them sharing mean jokes at the next poetry reading at Full Circle Bookstore. Maybe The Gazette should just stick with covering city politics, publishing non-critical food reviews and kissing Wayne Coyne's ass, and leave the sarcastic asshole shit to us.

Anyway, we can't take a beating like this from the Gazette without punching back, so we've decided to hit The Gazette where it really hurts: their wallet. We're now going to pursue their oldest, most loyal advertisers and try to convince them to switch their advertisements over to The Lost Ogle, the website that's been named the "Best Website" in OKC by Oklahoma Gazette "readers" for something like three out of the last four years.

First on the list, Edgar Cruz. To show him what a great deal an ad our site can be, we're giving Edgar three free months advertising on The Lost Ogle. Here are a few ads we designed. Even though we haven't technically received Edgar's permission to do this, they will start running on the site today. I doubt it will take three or four days for him to find out about them:

As an added bonus, we'll even name Edgar Cruz "Best Acoustic Guitarist" in our soon to be launched "Super Best of OKC." Outside of hiring Emily Sutton as their new meteorologist, there's nothing the Gazette can do to top this.

Patrick @okcpatrick

Patrick is the founder, editor and publisher of The Lost Ogle.