Friday Night in the Big Town: Bowie, Fleas and Hosty

How are those resolutions holding up? If you feel like rewarding yourself for good behavior or giving up on the stupid aspirations all together, here are some places you can start this weekend.

More Than Human: A Celebration of David Bowie
Tower Theatre  |  Jan. 6

Put on your best Ziggy Stardust and head to the Tower to re-experience Labyrinth with a whole lot of other people dressed as Ziggy Stardust. Before the movie, enjoy a celebration of Bowie’s music by Kali Ka. Stick around for the costume contest at 11. No word on what the prize may be, but one can only imagine…books from the recently launched book club bearing his name….posters….cds….Zoolander dvds…the possibilities are endless.

OKC Flea Market – Vintage, Antiques, Collectibles
Buchanan’s Flea Market  |  Jan. 6 – Jan. 9

The number one draw for this event is free parking! Thinking of going all Chip and Joanna Gaines on your house – this is the place to grab some funky old stuff that will never look as cool in your house as it does on tv. You could always try to find something that you can show off on Antiques Roadshow, that will not in fact turn out to be worth thousands of dollars. I’m sensing a pattern here, maybe my resolutions should have been to watch less television – nah, being more mouthy and opinionated is a much better goal for the year.

 

Hosty Live at The Root
Jan. 6

This guy has been on Jimmy Kimmel, so of course people are going to flock to see him perform, he’s a bona-fide celebrity from Norman. He’s a one-man band playing drums, guitar and singing all at once; that’s better coordination coming out of Norman than we’ve seen in a while. (Too soon?) His website states that he has a huge following of bikers, sorority gals, hippies and truckers – what more could I possibly say?

Enjoy your first weekend of ignoring your resolutions and realizing this year will be as good or as bad as the Oklahoma legislature wants it to be. Send your snide remarks to @KimMizar.

Kirk Humphreys will not go gently into that good night…

On December 19th, just a few days before he stepped down from the OU Board of Regents, former Oklahoma City mayor Kirk Humphreys participated in a press conference at John Rex Elementary School to formally apologize for sharing his backward “beliefs” about homosexuals, and in the process, try to salvage what’s left of his public reputation and career.

If a downtown elementary school seems like an odd place to apologize for comparing gays to pedophiles, it is, but keep in mind that John Rex Elementary School is a charter school affiliated with the University of Oklahoma, and that OU appointed Kirk to serve on the John Rex Board of Directors. In addition to that, Humphreys was involved in the creation of John Rex and provided funding via his family’s foundation.

At the conclusion of the Dec. 19th press conference, Kirk was whisked away for a private meeting with OKC School Board Chair Paula Lewis, OKC NAACP Chair Garland Pruitt, and Freedom Oklahoma’s Troy Stevenson. At the last minute, a handful of outraged John Rex student parent protesters were invited to participate.

We acquired via the Ogle Mole Network a synopsis of the meeting that was put together by the parents in attendance. Instead of simply apologizing and listening to what they had to say, they portray Humphreys as being argumentative and combative, doubling-down on some of his controversial comments, and attempting to beat back any call for him to step down from the school’s board. As one Mole in attendance put it:

“There was some shouting. By the end, nobody was really listening. Everyone was digging in their heels.”

You can check out the synopsis in its entirety below. When you do, please keep in mind that it was, once again, compiled by angry John Rex student parents who do, deservedly so, have an anti-Kirk Humphreys agenda. It tells the story from their point of view, and is obviously one-sided and not very objective. Basically, it’s like reading an article or editorial in The Oklahoman.

Here it is:

Groovy’s: One Night in the Tenth Circle of Hell

“I want to go dancing tonight!”

Ugh. There are few things more cringe-inducing than hearing the person you’re dating utter those six simple words on a Friday afternoon. Here it is, the end of a hard week, and nothing sounds better than just stripping down to your boxers, downing some Taco Bell and peacefully binging on Fuller House, but, then again, you remember that after a long dry-spell you finally have a romantic interest and these, my dear Eros, are the wages of love and lust.

Like most of my peers in the their mid-30s to middling-50s, all of whom are still desperately clinging to some semblance of forced vitality and fraudulent exuberance, the clarion’s call of Groovy’s, 5705 Mosteller Dr., is a strong one that seems to play a sweet tune we can all remember that promises lunchroom acceptance and strobe-lit non-judgment for the mostly tired and formerly aged on the dancefloor, unlike many of those far more coveted Bricktown joints, or so I have been told.

I myself had only ever been to a dance club once or twice back in the 90s, and that was really more of a meeting place for chubby Goths to stand in the corner and nurse a Dr. Pepper while the overhead blacklights reflected every single kernel of skin dander emanating from that black Bauhaus t-shirt. So for an alternative rebel that eschews choreographed community, such as myself, the mere thought of stepping foot into a place like Groovy’s filled me with an extra special kind of venomous fear and caustic loathing.

Still, I wanted to make her happy or at least some semblance thereof, so I dutifully pushed these valid feelings down very deep and, using the Strasberg Method, put on a very enthusiastic happy face, even asking her to show me some “groovy dance moves ha ha” which, let’s be honest, turned out to be memorized Zumba routines but, you know, whatever. She’s endured a trip or two to Guestroom Records with me, the least I could do is pretend to enjoy the…

Oklahoma Lawmaker Quotes to Inspire your 2018

Happy 2018, all you TLO fanatics! Hopefully your 2017 wasn’t too big of a figurative dumpster fire. And if it was, I am sure you drank enough to forget at least the last 6 hours of the year. The good news is, if you started the year drunk off your ass, you can only go up from there. With all of this millennial “new year, new me” crap trending on twitter over the last 4 days, it appears everyone is looking for inspiration to make this year great. What better way to find that inspiration than through motivational quotes from our esteemed lawmakers!

Now, the following quotes are taken completely out of context and probably make absolutely no sense to the common reader. Thank God you have me to interpret them in a way that will inspire your 2018. So here are some Oklahoma lawmaker quotes to live your life by in 2018.

“I’m just trying to have a good time.” Former Senator Ralph Shortey

Joe Exotic seriously injured in car accident!

Oklahoma gubernatorial candidate Joe Exotic was seriously injured in a car accident late last night.

Naturally, news of the accident was first released on Joe’s Facebook page by a person (or tiger) named RINK:

According to NewsOK.com, details of the accident haven’t been released. Whatever the cause, I’m sure Joe will find a way to blame PETA.

Here’s a photo of Joe in the hospital that was shared by his new husband Dillon a few hours ago. Joe looks pretty beaten up: