The Jerk Store called and they are running out of Garth Brooks

Garth Brooks is a successful guy. He's been nominated for 14 Grammys, had 18 number one hits and has sold over 69,000,000 albums. He has a popular Vegas show, has been invited to MLB spring training and even created a shitty alter ego named Chris Gains.

He's also rich. According to celebrity net worth, Garth is worth $325-million dollars. That's enough money to buy The Lost Ogle and The Pioneer Woman. He owns a cowboy super ranch outside of Owasso, about 87% of Nashville and probably a horse or two. According to Clark Matthews, he even has a secret lab dedicated to creating a unicorn.

Anyway, Garth Brooks is also an asshole. He's suing a hospital for $500,000. Via the AP:

Lawyers for country singer Garth Brooks told jurors Wednesday that a hospital’s internal documents back his claim that a $500,000 donation was intended for a women’s center to be named after his late mother.

Brooks wants the Integris Canadian Valley Regional Hospital in his hometown of Yukon to return the money, donated in 2005. He claims in a lawsuit that hospital administrators reneged on their pledge to name a part of a medical complex after Colleen Brooks...

Lisa Riggs, a lawyer for Brooks, told jurors the hospital lured the singer, deliberately and falsely claiming it would build the women’s center and display Colleen Brooks’ name “like the Hollywood sign in Los Angeles.”

“This is not what Garth Brooks had bargained for,” Riggs said. “Over six years after the donation, nothing is named after Colleen Brooks.

“It was a simple deal: $500,000 and mom’s name is on the women’s center,” Riggs told jurors. “In (Brooks’) words, it was an easy deal to get done.

When did Garth Brooks become the mean banker from the Dirt Bike Kid? The guy's worth $325-million and he's suing a hospital for $500,000 because they didn't name a hospital wing after his mom. That would be like me driving back to Taco Bell and asking for a refund because they didn't leave the red sauce off my bean burrito.

Seriously, what a tool. I hope the thunder rolls and the lightning strikes him right on the head. Maybe INTEGRIS did lie and maybe they are a "not for profit" system that generates billions of dollars in revenue, but who cares. Live with it and move on! This is a hospital. You don't donate something to them and then ask for it back. That's such an Indi...uh...uhh...uhhh...taker backer (!!!) thing to do. Thanks Rugrats!

Also, does anyone else find this whole thing kind of creepy? I love my Mom like any other guy, but I'd never want a hospital wing named after her. And if I did, I sure wouldn't want her name to be as big as the Hollywood sign. That's just strange. Hell, Garth also probably made INTEGRIS promise to play the Dance on constant repeat in the ICU.

Anyway, I hope Garth Brooks loses this case. Sure, INTEGRIS is loaded, but the money went to construct a hospital and/or pay ridiculous executive salaries and/or to write off bad debt owed by poor people without insurance. That's money well spent if you ask me.